Two steps forward three steps back

Standing naked and exposed I look down to the ground, I see it. Regrets, insecurities, lessons learned, lifeless laying on the floor the exact way I left them. Searching tirelessly for a piece of my flesh unmarked I press the red hot iron in and without a scream but a single tear I remember. I reach below to the beckoning steel and jade wrapping it's pieces strategically around my bruises and wounds. This cold pressed against my body chills me to my soul and in this moment I forget who I am. With new eyes I am blind, with my skin covered I can't feel, though my heart still beats you will be oblivious to it's rhythms. The weight of this is heavy crushing the man inside, willingly I will exist here for out there on the battlefield, without this I will die.