Bleed

Bleed

I would press down and sigh
The deep slice
Felt so nice
Carried me out of dysfunctional haze
Billabong into grey dominions
Where I felt nothing...
But the sovereign sweet of it's sting

I would watch with dull eyes
the vermillion spill
percolating red rivulets
My rusty Arroyo
In the dry empty place
Where My mind
My sordid soul
Had created and left only dark spaces

Now I study the aftermath of self destruction
Memory wets my eyes
Once vivid with life
Reflecting my blue skies  
Now greyed by the elegy of years past
The  jagged cicatrix flashes white
Against the Scarlett heat
Left by Shame

And still
I feel an addicts dolar tug
Begging me to inflict self harm
And skirt myself with red lunatic fringe