Sunset Serenade

Here's my final thoughts about that last day we said goodbye
After we first split of course I did most things out of spite
For some reason It displeased me to speak bad about you or tell a lie
Even defended your name whenever a hater was talking shit I'd start to fight
Of course I became bitter but for some reason my tongue tied
I must've felt guilty for living a filthy, shifty, and shady drug addicted life
This relationship was rough but if I'm being honest it felt right

To young to understand our sky was falling maybe someday the stars might realign
Like each path of life we cross eventually move past it and divide
I was ashamed and blamed myself because instead of you I chased a high
I crucified myself with every lie I lived to tell and for all my sins I'll die
After every fight you became stronger  and I always apologised
Looking back now it's sad because I was trying to make up for lost time
When my father left i guess my childhood was left behind
Unable to fully understand responsibilities I was a baby heavy headed i lead blind

The funny thing is legal separation had brought us back together for the day.
We filed for divorce but we still talked like nothing ever changed.
The witness was confused she had to ask us if this was a divorce or a mistake
We signed and finally some peace of mind returned it was finally over
That car ride felt like an eternity but slowly time was speeding up from out of nowhere
I started to remember every time you put me down creating insecurities
Clumsy, carless, why date someone you don't find attractive and collapse them?

Then I remembered Seattle, Portland, L.A. and when you walked into the poll entering hempfest
It finally hit me...It was really ending
My arms and knees becoming weak started shaking fiercely

I had so much I wanted to comment and so much to tell you
I felt anger, sadness, joy, and depression and then i look over thinking of what to say next
You look calm and collected then you look at me smiling, your finally happy thats all I really wanted so I quietly accept it

I felt if i said anything it would have ruined the mood
So instead of letting my mouth fuck up this last afternoon
I asked if you had a question you wanted to ask or two
I assumed you'd have at least one about my bad habits or about my second job on the block where everyone is packin
Of course you ask me the question i was hoping you wouldn't choose
If i ever shared my love with someone other then you.
I stared into the beauty of your blue eyes I paused and that's when i knew
Even after the distance, drugs, cheating, dealing, and everything we went through
I still loved you so much i couldn't handle the pain of once again hurting you
But even though it's been long over i still couldn't tell you the truth
I was always a really great liar and the answer would only ruin the veiw
We both teared up and hugged it was a sad kind of happy I'm sure you knew

Chuy-"Well I guess I'll cya later? Well I don't ever want to get in the way of your family if i am in any way?"

Swine-"Chuy you know we can't ever talk again, I don't want to disrespect my boyfriend and you know I never did anything behind your back."

Chuy-"Well i guess that's it huh? I hope life goes great for you and your family. Im being completely honest when i say this. I hope we never talk again but I'll be happy if we ever do."

Swine-"i guess this is goodbye for ever"

Chuy-"Goodbye forever hopefully...or not?"

This one's from me
Dedicated to you
You're my last serenade
Like a fine wine we've aged
To a new chapter we turn a blank page

This is goodbye my love bug
I sincerely apologise once again
Hopefully your life isn't rough
Cheers to our friendship....the end