Awry

Is this the last goodbye?
The last time you see me cry?
No, you didn't notice,
I hid behind a door,
A knife in my hand
Contemplating if I deserve worse.
I feel remorse,
I feel shame,
I feel regret.
The shadows are closing in,
This night is the last I am.
You profess your love
While resenting the monster inside,
An unlovable being that I have become.
The night shows the depth
Of this cold, pitiless wretch.
No longer bound,
No longer chained,
You are free to leave.
But please, I beg of you,
Do not torment this shattered creature
With duty or responsibility.
Have we no heart
To let bygones be bygones?
Shall I now return the ring
That meant a forever thing?
Or will you hover
So that I have to bear all?
My heart breaks the longer you stay,
But is that not what you would say,
That I am the cruel one
To so ignore your pain!
We are forever floating in a bed
Of resent and hate,
It all becomes he said, she said.
Now the tide has risen high,
Testing the pieces of our guarded hearts.
No more can we suffocate
In this darkened energy,
We must set ourselves free!
You once asked
If I loved you enough to let you go,
The answer is yes, my beloved,
For neither thee nor me
Can bear this pain!
Mine is a too broken heart
To give you what you truly need,
Mine is a love gone awry, and
I am still finding the pieces
That was lost so long ago.
But if and when you go, my beloved,
Just so you know,
Mine love is eternal and will never rest.