More than one way to skin a man

Hi everybody
Audience" Hi doctor Ed"
In today's show we'll show you how to skin pesky humans alive
ever had corpses you needed to skin son
boy "Always it's why the neighbors homes are so expensive"
Oh do not worry son we have all been there-right everybody
Audience  "right"
Today have five ways of skinning the corpse
first of all you'll need a live human
Say hi to the lovely people Alice in lovely chains
Alice "hi everybody"
Clapping and screaming audience "hi Alice"
She tried to stop this show from airing today
angry audience "boo!"
the first way to skin Alice is naturally with a large peeler
make sure it is at least 6 inches long for maximum pain on the human
Audience woohing and clapping
Our next candidate is Bart
Alice's lawyer
for him we have a machine gun
now the trick to skinning him is to narrowly miss the body
so that it scrapes the skin off-oh we have a question
Old lady"won't that ruin my new carpet?"
Oh dear me no it will give the skin a new artistic layer
but you might end up killing the victim and your new home may become very red
audience laughing loudly
for the carpet skin effect we recommend our third method
you'll need a Katina to slice off parts of the skin
Like thise-host slices off a large piece of another man's back presenting the skin to the crowd
clapping-this is Steve he got our pizza order wrong
Now our 4th way of skinning is for the whole family
cut a small piece of the skin to grip onto and then rip it off
man yelling"when should we start this skinning hobby Dr Ed"
as soon as possible my meat loving man
Oh and this is Alice Alice's twin sister...she definitely came in screaming
crowd giggles
Last but not least this is Mark my apprentice
he spilled coffee on my shirt
Now the 5th method of skinning someone is anyway you please
as long as you're skinning
why
audience yells"because there is more than one way to skin a man"
the audience then starts to Mark while the credits are rolling