(1) Highway thoughts (08/25/23 @ 10:00pm)

 

Swerving on this dark California highway.
Contemplating memories that occurred today.
I’m lost & drowsy behind the wheel.
Two in the morning, you know the deal.
 
My only friend is gone, now my heart’s blown.
My dilated pupils will let it be known.
I’m unbothered to even realize;
It’s the reflection from the mirror telling lies.
 
In the back seat on my way to a kickback.
I’m cruising East L.A. slangin’ dope sacks.
Lining up my cocaine ‘cause I can’t get off track.
Rolling up laced blunts, popping the seals off xanax.
 
Enjoying my journey;
The light's burnt out & my fumes burning.
I’m impaired, keep me away from the light.
Switching lanes as my mind takes flight.
 
Behind the light, roaming late at night.
I’ll be fortunate to make it out alive.
When I die, don’t bury me in the ground.
May my ashes be released at sea, airbound.
 
Driving insanely fast through heavy traffic.
My intrusive thoughts are quite graphic.
My compulsions make me sick!
Tooting pipes back to back with my hemp wick.
 
Behind the bullet of a 9mm semi automatic pistol;
Lurks a damaged individual smoking crystal.
Pure cartel narcotics, you’ll be numb from your skull.
 Countless chemical temptations, why should life be dull?
 
I went back to my old neighborhood.
Parked my ride before I sparked up my backwood
It’s what I do, there’s no telling what lies ahead.
Close call collisions ‘cause I’m getting topped, road head.
 
After I smoke, my mind wanders into the abyss.
Tonight can either be chaotic or pure bliss.
Known as a local pharmacist ‘cause my dope is highgrade.
Fuck catching cases bitch, I’m always down to run a fade!
 
I am neither a gangster nor a punk ass bitch.
I’m a severe addict getting drunk as shit.
My speech is slurred, incomprehensible.
Losing control as I continue to feel invisible.
 
Depression, aggression, misery & anxiety.
I can’t bear the thought of living in sobriety.
I know I don’t belong in this twisted society.
Judgmental as they bash me for living “improperly”
 
Nevertheless, they can’t break me from my sanity.
Nobody can stop me from using profanity.
This world is fucked, I’m referring to all humanity.
From Catholicism to Christinanity, we all live in vanity.  
 
You ignorant motherfuckers stay living in vain.
The rest of you pussies inhabit your sorrow & pain.
It’s easy to ignore my feelings when I’m on the caine.
I lined up perfectly before I boarded my plane.
 
My kidneys hurt from all this alcohol I bought.
Brutal honesty, I’m smart enough not to get caught.
I didn’t learn anything in school, I was never taught.
My life in the streets taught me to never trust a cop.