deepundergroundpoetry.com
I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo Jelly Jars ...
My pecan brown mother raised me to fear only one thing
failure.
It wasn't hard for me to understand this
hopscotching the needles and junkies painted along the sidewalks
like they belonged there and I was all wrong.
She sent me to my grandmother's farm during the summer so I'd know what was right
in me.
As the curtain rose
on many a cerulean night
Along the Bohicket River
the reverberations of crickets' altos
beckoned a response from the bass
of the bullfrogs under our porch.
They were the old deacons giving their guttural approval for the release of my dreams.
The sound of the chorus ricocheted off
the pitch of night
bringing the stars closer.
James Brown was right
Black is Beautiful.
By morning I'd set free the frogs I'd caught
and placed in mason jars.
They were replaced by
Dragonflies.
Red ants.
Black ants.
And fiddler crabs.
It didn't come easy cause I got
Bit.
Stung.
Pinched.
And pissed on.
"Boy what you learn from all that chasin?"
my grandmother Evelina would ask.
With bowed head I'd question her question with
"M'am?"
"You heard me boy."
"Dreams don't come easy," I told her, "sometimes it hurts chasing them. Sometimes they die."
"Come ya'. Have something to drink before you catch monkey next," she'd chuckle. Her honey toned skin beaming.
As I sipped her too sweet red Kool Aid out of my Scooby Doo jelly jar
I smiled
thinking about what I was gonna chase next.
Squirrels.
Raccoons from grandma's garden.
Hogs in my uncle's pen.
It was my world to conquer
my choice to make
because pecans and honey
made it so.
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likes 22
reading list entries 10
comments 31
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The author encourages honest critique.
Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
29th Dec 2015 1:05pm
This is amazing writing Lo
Hope you have other places to post because this is powerful stuff and should be read by a serious audience
Bravo
Hope you have other places to post because this is powerful stuff and should be read by a serious audience
Bravo
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Re: Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby
29th Dec 2015 1:17pm
Thank you so much Poe ... Slowly but surely I've been getting more and more of my writing out to other publishers ...
This is one I hope to find a second home for as well. Thanks for the RL add ... Much appreciated.
This is one I hope to find a second home for as well. Thanks for the RL add ... Much appreciated.
Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
29th Dec 2015 1:12pm
Re: Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby
29th Dec 2015 1:19pm
Thank you for the kind words and your time in reading it. I'm buoyed by your encouragement.
Cheers.
Cheers.
Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
29th Dec 2015 1:38pm
Excellent, San Pedro. I know that river and I know that countryside. I know those dreams from my own time on farms, in streams, through woods, in caves, and up mountains. Catch and release; catch and release. Life is a dream in which we live and breathe.
Thanks for the memory.
Thanks for the memory.
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Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
29th Dec 2015 1:42pm
Really nice piece--I love how there's always a story in your writing no matter what the style 😊
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Re: Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby
30th Dec 2015 1:49am
Thank you dear Madame ... It comes from listening to my uncles - great strory tellers ... No one spins a story like a southern minister.
You're the best!
You're the best!
Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
29th Dec 2015 4:06pm
Raccoons from grandma's garden.
Hogs in my uncle's pen.
It was my world to conquer
my choice to make
because pecans and honey
made it so.
Saw this in the comp hunny bunny..
So endearing and charming Lobo..
I love an honest peek into what makes up my fellow poets here..
Just enamored by this...
Had very similar experiences growing up..with the varmints lol...and treasured relatives..some one in the same! Lol
Great piece doll...
Love
Jen
Hogs in my uncle's pen.
It was my world to conquer
my choice to make
because pecans and honey
made it so.
Saw this in the comp hunny bunny..
So endearing and charming Lobo..
I love an honest peek into what makes up my fellow poets here..
Just enamored by this...
Had very similar experiences growing up..with the varmints lol...and treasured relatives..some one in the same! Lol
Great piece doll...
Love
Jen
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Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
29th Dec 2015 6:20pm
"Dreams don't come easy," I told her, "sometimes it hurts chasing them. Sometimes they die."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am enraptured by innocence of this line against the backdrop of a boy capturing snapshots of nature in mason jars.
Brilliant work!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am enraptured by innocence of this line against the backdrop of a boy capturing snapshots of nature in mason jars.
Brilliant work!
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Re: Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby
30th Dec 2015 1:55am
Thank you for picking that out ... My grandmother was a simple woman who hadn't even finished grade school but she always challenged me to think about things, and how they worked in the world versus my place in it. (Of course being from the south there were plenty of Amens and "God willing" mixed in).
All the best to you in the New Year!
All the best to you in the New Year!
Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
29th Dec 2015 6:40pm
Re: Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby
30th Dec 2015 1:56am
Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
31st Dec 2015 00:35am
"Dreams don't come easy," I told her, "sometimes it hurts chasing them. Sometimes they die."
I can certainly relate to this. Great poem!
I can certainly relate to this. Great poem!
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Re: Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby
31st Dec 2015 2:57am
Thank you for taking the time to read and comment on this ...
It's amazing sometimes how the simple lessons of childhood serve us until the very end.
Thank you for the RL add.
All the best to you in 2016.
It's amazing sometimes how the simple lessons of childhood serve us until the very end.
Thank you for the RL add.
All the best to you in 2016.
Anonymous
- Edited 8th Nov 2018 00:49am
1st Jan 2016 4:52pm
<< post removed >>
Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
lol ... I suppose if I move it to erotica with an EXTREME label I could get ten times the reads and comments ... After all I mention pinching, biting and being pissed on - lol
While this didn't flash a lot of reads here ... It's the quality of the feedback I've gotten in comments, and the reading list entries that have moved me most ... And I've taken the suggestion given, and submitted this and some other work to a few publishers ...
I appreciate the support.
Salud.
While this didn't flash a lot of reads here ... It's the quality of the feedback I've gotten in comments, and the reading list entries that have moved me most ... And I've taken the suggestion given, and submitted this and some other work to a few publishers ...
I appreciate the support.
Salud.
Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
8th Jan 2016 5:40pm
why on earth have i not read you before... mio dio, i've missed out...
lsp, this is [simply said] beautiful & filled with unspoiled wonder... wanna go sit on my stoop & read this to my daughter who's starting preschool & get the message through to her
absolutely loved this
~ k
lsp, this is [simply said] beautiful & filled with unspoiled wonder... wanna go sit on my stoop & read this to my daughter who's starting preschool & get the message through to her
absolutely loved this
~ k
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Re: Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby
9th Jan 2016 10:17am
Wow! What a compliment! As a father of two daughters I'm flattered beyond words that you'd want to share this with your daughter ... I hope it helps her learn to chase her own bullfrogs and dragonflies, careful with the red ants - they bite the hardest.
Thank you for the RL add.
Salud
Thank you for the RL add.
Salud
Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
16th Jan 2016 3:19pm
There's not much else to say without sounding like a broken record player...but the imagery and vocabulary are amazingly in sync portraying your message vividly visualy....beutiful words to go with such a captivating title....*round of applause*
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Re: Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby
17th Jan 2016 3:29am
Thank you for taking the time to read and comment on this ... The support and feedback on this particular poem has rejuvenated me in so many ways
Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
Anonymous
13th Feb 2016 4:18pm
i have no words. i've read this three times now and each time i just want to dig a whole in my heart and let this piece fill it up. so good, LSP. so very good.
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Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
2nd Mar 2016 9:38pm
I too remember how my mind soared and how my dreams were nourished just by getting away from the madness of the city
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Re: Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby
3rd Mar 2016 2:56am
Those Summers were sacred and probably saved my life in so many ways ... Thank you for the comment and RL add
Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
25th Jun 2016 4:54am
Re: Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby
25th Jun 2016 9:08am
Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
15th Jul 2016 11:28am
I wondered what 'world' you'd be capturing in those Mason jars before I read...that was a good thing becuz it automatically sent my mind wandering! lol then of course as I read the entirety I was like WOW...for me nature has always been a world of wonder!! I loved this very deep n meaning full piece dude :)
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Re: Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby
15th Jul 2016 3:52pm
Thank you for the read and comments ... There's something about the simply beauty of nature that soothes us all
Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
Anonymous
15th Sep 2016 12:12pm
I love that you've captured a story of hope here. I also like the reference to mason jars. Originally made to preserve food. Perhaps you are preserving a memory here. Well written also, and very much enjoyed...
but I've never understood the need to fear failure. Failure is kind of beautiful in its own way. There's something romantic in the trying. Meh, just my thoughts.
Thank you for the read.
but I've never understood the need to fear failure. Failure is kind of beautiful in its own way. There's something romantic in the trying. Meh, just my thoughts.
Thank you for the read.
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Re: Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby
I understand the "failure" you speak of ... I was just going through this very lesson with my students this afternoon. I told them, "sometimes you learn as much from what doesn't work, as you do from what does ... "
... but the failure my mother warned of was much more ominous growing up in NYC as I did ... Heorin was virtually a staple in my neighborhood; within an eight month time span I had a 9 year old cousin and his friend crushed and killed by a NYC subway car while they were trying to dodge the police, and my father was shot and killed by the NYPD (he had deep seeded demons) ...
Some of it's outlined here ...
http://deepundergroundpoetry.com/poems/216178-marsha-marsha-marsha/
That was the "failure" my mother warned me of, thus my reference to hopscotching needles and junkies in this poem ...
Thanks for the read ... It's always most appreciated from you
... but the failure my mother warned of was much more ominous growing up in NYC as I did ... Heorin was virtually a staple in my neighborhood; within an eight month time span I had a 9 year old cousin and his friend crushed and killed by a NYC subway car while they were trying to dodge the police, and my father was shot and killed by the NYPD (he had deep seeded demons) ...
Some of it's outlined here ...
http://deepundergroundpoetry.com/poems/216178-marsha-marsha-marsha/
That was the "failure" my mother warned me of, thus my reference to hopscotching needles and junkies in this poem ...
Thanks for the read ... It's always most appreciated from you
Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby Doo
Anonymous
9th Aug 2017 7:59pm
The way you share your story here is like sitting on the back porch listening to your words as the wind stirs the grass and leaves. You take us there and hold us captive in your telling and then release us filled with beautiful imagery. Very much enjoyed this piece. Thank you for sharing it with us here. It needs a much bigger audience though, in my opinion. :)
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Re: Re. I Captured the World in Mason Jars while drinking from Scooby
10th Aug 2017 6:44am
It warms me that you found this ... it's a piece that's dear to me on so many levels. I've been fortunate enough to find those larger audiences you speak of, as this poem has been published in two different journals, and I've presented it twice as a featured poet on stages in NYC including the fabled Nuyorican Poets Cafe.