Christmas Canceler

This is the first time in my life
Where we aren't staying up all night
Together forever on Christmas night
We'd sing and play cards or punch ourselves in the face
And no one else would know what's going on.
I'm sorry I let you down
I wish I could have been around
But instead I have to make commitments to fickle people
And there's nothing I can do with the cards I have been dealt
Sorry for being such a shitty brother
And always calling you names
Sorry for being such a shitty person
And never caring about anything
Sorry for blaming you when it's my fault
It's always my fault, I can't deal
With being yelled at for making stupid mistakes
At the end of the night
you two should know that you're my best friends
And you should know that I would die for you individually.
I'm sorry for being such a horrible brother
I'm sorry for always letting you down
I'm really just a fucking stupid guy
and all I ever do is think about myself.