Stalker

I'm all in .....

PS, I knew youd be all in babe. <3

Brilliant, Mysterious.. you the woman.. with love..



Dave

Thanks Dave. I try. :D  
<3

This strikes me as ambiguous.  The stalker is sinister with her face concealed in the shadows but still fancies herself desirable.  And her appetites are spinning out of control.  "I touch myself and moan your name."  

"Your scent drives me mad
I want to grab you and keep you
Only for me and my torturous games"

This is where the stalker becomes more of a menace more than a determined seductress.  I'd sure like to know what those games involve.  Might just roll the dice, Lady.  Fine work!

Its a little bit of everything...Thanks Crow...I always love to read your thoughts on how you see things. <3

lovely lady this is a very seductive and chilling write would love to be the object of your desire..

with love Crimsin

When the sun goes down, crim. <3

gotta love the shadows, dangerous & thrilling. sinister work...

Always love when you sneak in for a visit, JF...thanks deeply.
The darkness is sexy yet scary...indeed. <3

Fuck!! N here I thought I was well hidden!! lol but hey, cum n get at me, I'm UP anytime lol

I knew it was you!  <3 hugs

People wonder why there is such a thing as a restraining order.Thanks to this poem I'm not gonna sleep any time soon

Actually, I hear ya. It sucks to live in fear.

So much uncertainty as to the real intent of the one being stalked. Great write.

Thanks JAZZ. Thats kinda what I was going for. <3

Kinky stalking, it's going to be the new rage. All the young uns will be doing it now. Lol

Nice ink, enjoyed.

Its an huge compliment seeing you in my feed. Thanks you! <3

*chilling* is all that comes to mind. . .It's obvious we don't need 'big brother', strangers are doing it for them, and on a more intimate level. . .Wicked write, Miss Lady. . .Devlin;)

Thank you, thats kinda what I was goin for...creepyish not to be confused with creeperish..lol. glad you liked it. <3

I really like the "I eat where you sleep part" - Bravo.

Why thank you, LeColonel! Nice to see you in my feed <3

Down right creepy make me think of an x-girl friend I had years ago she keep driving by my house after we broke up and I seem to bump into her all the time. this just makes me think of that chills up and down my spine. Love the poem.

Thank for sharing

I had one of these actually. It is creepy. Keep you eyes open and your heads up people! Thanks for the insight DP. <3

"I eat where you sleep" brings up all kinds of imagery and dread. Malevolent to the core. Well done.

Thank you very much doll. <3

hullo Lady

it reads rather well, and does evoke strong images and thoughts and there is a nice rhythm within the stanzas.

now,  look, these are just my thoughts:

I think you could drop "where I know you cannot see" from the first line, only because hidden away already kinda says no one can see you.

you've created a good sense of tense with the stanzas, like a psychological thriller. I think you could improve on it if you cut some of the words:

'I saw you look at me'  ( saw the moon shine in the whites of your eyes ) ..bring us there

I eat where you sleep
I sleep at your feet  <- these two lines are very strong  and I think they over power the third line in that stanza, so I suggest you line break after feet and give the third line space for itself   ..or add a line or two to it if you've the mind to

I think you could drop 'only' in the fifth stanza and switch 'as' to 'while' at the end of the fourth  


all in though, my thoughts not withstanding, it's a great expression of feeling and I tip my hat to you for that. it reads well and has a sinister feel to it. fair play

good stuff  

Thanks Craic <3...Unfortunately, I am under some other influences when I post here. . I am happy that they make even the slightest of sense to some of you! <3 Sometimes, I tend to get in my own way, if you can appreciate that. <3

I can of course appreciate it. you're very welcome

hugs

Hell yes!

xoxox<3