the fold is not for me

sounds that once made
my heart swell with passion
for an invisible joy
that put a glow on my
childish face

now echo in my mind
haunting these dark hallways
even after all these years
of sacrilegious claims
and blasphemy against
every holy name

casting no crowns
at the feet of no being
but my own heart
following rabbit trails
down beaten paths
of insanity

I'm a familiar stranger
in a now foreign land
the anthem rings loud and clear
and comforts me
but repels me
all at once