deepundergroundpoetry.com
Lady in black
She dresses in black. the veil of mourning
that drapes her heart.
over the years, under the bridges
the waters of her crystalline tears flow, unhindered;
torrent of moments, somber parade of yesterdays
over the years. under the bridges.
I kissed her once. she trembled; my lips were frost.
cloaked her in my bluest shirt, embracing,
but yet she wept. my charm was infidel.
once. I kissed her.
stars: unlustered, crackling cinders. moon of onyx
the night, cimmerian; ghosts of tepid pallor
mirage of tantric candles. the symphony, a dirge
low onyx moon. and craquelure stars, bizarre, maroon.
could I love her, be the light of her salvation?
storm the gothic moor, unbolt her oaken door –
withering hero, my folly defeats me:
light is the submissive bride of darkness
and love, a wicked dream.
her heart – sojourner in the vale of mourning.
and she dresses in black…
Published 16th Mar 2015
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 18
reading list entries 1
comments 15
reads 1585
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The author encourages honest critique.
16th Mar 2015 9:49pm
Ladies in black are dangerous indeed John...great write mate.
Cheers...Harry
Cheers...Harry
16th Mar 2015 9:59pm
16th Mar 2015 11:01pm
Am sure JF you'd capture anyone with your words ...
They disintegrate that veil... ;)
Deliciously descriptive....it begs to be read again & again...which is what I've done... :)
They disintegrate that veil... ;)
Deliciously descriptive....it begs to be read again & again...which is what I've done... :)
16th Mar 2015 11:20pm
This is not so much a poem as it is a passionate, orphic experience. Each word blends into the next and you can live it out-of-body. Truly masterful wordsmithing
17th Mar 2015 00:05am
17th Mar 2015 3:44am
Takes a real man to know he is not capable of giving something he doesn't have. No promises.
Reading you is like..expansion.
Thank you.
Reading you is like..expansion.
Thank you.
17th Mar 2015 5:35am
Who can break a lady in black, let the light in? I sometimes worry that no one can. Beautifully written as always, Mr. Feddeler. Gorgeous picture as well, sir, I want to steal the lace from her. :)
Anonymous
17th Mar 2015 8:31am
Jawn....youzuh killher poeitt
17th Mar 2015 8:34am
I was thumbing through bits of Bukowski this morning, and came across this quote ... It made me think of your prolific pen ...
... If I had been born a woman I would have certainly been a prostitute. Since I had been born a man, I craved women constantly, the lower the better. A yet women -- good women -- frightened me because they eventually wanted your soul, and what was left of mine, I wanted to keep. Basically I craved prostitutes, base women, because they were deadly and hard and made no personal demands. Nothing was lost when they left. Yet at the same time I yearned for a gentle, good woman, despite the overwhelming price. Either way I was lost. A strong man would give up both. I wasn't strong. So I continued to struggle with women, the idea of a woman. - Bukowski
I'm guessing he'd enjoy reading you John
... If I had been born a woman I would have certainly been a prostitute. Since I had been born a man, I craved women constantly, the lower the better. A yet women -- good women -- frightened me because they eventually wanted your soul, and what was left of mine, I wanted to keep. Basically I craved prostitutes, base women, because they were deadly and hard and made no personal demands. Nothing was lost when they left. Yet at the same time I yearned for a gentle, good woman, despite the overwhelming price. Either way I was lost. A strong man would give up both. I wasn't strong. So I continued to struggle with women, the idea of a woman. - Bukowski
I'm guessing he'd enjoy reading you John
17th Mar 2015 3:52pm
great ink as usual :-)
the third stanza 'stars: unlustered,........' seems out of place and interupts the flow. It's well written and could stand alone as a short poem, but I am having trouble fitting it in ?
Maybe it's just me :-)
the third stanza 'stars: unlustered,........' seems out of place and interupts the flow. It's well written and could stand alone as a short poem, but I am having trouble fitting it in ?
Maybe it's just me :-)
17th Mar 2015 4:21pm
I like the contrast between the "veil" and "vale" of mourning. There are clues to the late relationship, the lips of frost. But only hints, just as it should be.
17th Mar 2015 6:14pm
Your lines are like stabs in the dark. Shredding the veil, revealing her weakening chains, or his. Enjoyed!
17th Mar 2015 8:31pm
JohnFeddeler, you just let me know when you are ready to come to me...I'm waiting. All in black, just as you like it.
17th Mar 2015 9:28pm
Really beautiful piece. Full of stunning imagery, and I like the way you weave your words together. Awesome stuff!
22nd Mar 2015 6:04am
You write of a "somber parade of yesterdays," but your work is a parade of beautiful phrases and images. Beautifully written, John !
