deepundergroundpoetry.com
An Ode to the Emo
Emo, emo, full of fail. Why do you slit your wrists so frail?
Emo, emo, you look lost. Remember, it's down the street, not across.
Emo, emo, oh so gay. Can't you see that life's not grey?
Emo girl, why do you cry?
Oh I'm sorry, from a distance I didn't know you were a guy.
With your skinny jeans, acting like other tards.
Oh yeah, nothing says sexy like sob stories, and feeble scars
Emo, emo, depressed again. OH what are the odds?
Are you sad because your parents didn't get you the newest iPod?
Emo, emo, why so glum?
You're young, dumb and let me guess...write poems and songs?
Emo, emo...what the hell is wrong?
You are not depressed, it's all an illusion
You cry, you mope, and claim you face persecution
Emo, seriously, stop it please.
No one gives a damn
Alright...it's true, you have a disease
It's called bitchassness, and I"m here to
Give you a healthy dose of man the fuck up
You can't escape, take a drink from the cup
You have all your limbs attached,
Why worry if your so called newest perfect match
Doesn't text you back?
You could live in Iraq
Where you could get blown up any day by an insurgent attack
So think about that, next time you try to milk me for sympathy
Acting like an attention whore and being all sad
How the hell did you fit into those jeans? BY GAWD
PS. Depression is not a fad.
Emo, emo, you look lost. Remember, it's down the street, not across.
Emo, emo, oh so gay. Can't you see that life's not grey?
Emo girl, why do you cry?
Oh I'm sorry, from a distance I didn't know you were a guy.
With your skinny jeans, acting like other tards.
Oh yeah, nothing says sexy like sob stories, and feeble scars
Emo, emo, depressed again. OH what are the odds?
Are you sad because your parents didn't get you the newest iPod?
Emo, emo, why so glum?
You're young, dumb and let me guess...write poems and songs?
Emo, emo...what the hell is wrong?
You are not depressed, it's all an illusion
You cry, you mope, and claim you face persecution
Emo, seriously, stop it please.
No one gives a damn
Alright...it's true, you have a disease
It's called bitchassness, and I"m here to
Give you a healthy dose of man the fuck up
You can't escape, take a drink from the cup
You have all your limbs attached,
Why worry if your so called newest perfect match
Doesn't text you back?
You could live in Iraq
Where you could get blown up any day by an insurgent attack
So think about that, next time you try to milk me for sympathy
Acting like an attention whore and being all sad
How the hell did you fit into those jeans? BY GAWD
PS. Depression is not a fad.
Published 10th May 2011
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 1
reading list entries 0
comments 7
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
10th May 2011 9:01am
Technique?
For me your rhyme's not slick enough to be clever or amusing and it often plain just gets in the way.
Original?
This is hardly novel or even a stream of groundbreaking thought is it.
Emotional Impact?
Almost at "down the street, not across" but thereafter a desert, I'm afraid.
Verdict: Perhaps, you could do better if you injected some raw passion into your poet veins, rather than jumping on what's become a tired & jaded bandwagon.
Best ~ Abra
For me your rhyme's not slick enough to be clever or amusing and it often plain just gets in the way.
Original?
This is hardly novel or even a stream of groundbreaking thought is it.
Emotional Impact?
Almost at "down the street, not across" but thereafter a desert, I'm afraid.
Verdict: Perhaps, you could do better if you injected some raw passion into your poet veins, rather than jumping on what's become a tired & jaded bandwagon.
Best ~ Abra
10th May 2011 7:03pm
It was something that I started in a chatroom, so therefore it's not really something I meant to be taken seriously. However, all of your criticism is correct, I did mean this piece to be exactly that.
10th May 2011 5:10pm
well, the band wagon isn't playing any tiny violins. i felt raw passion. the feeling is mutual and i guess if you can't relate, you shouldn't descriminate but at any rate its hard not to notice this pitty party thats pissed about the spiked punch. i thought your rhyme was right for plight of the emo's.
hush little emo, i said don't shed no tears.. no emo no cry.
hush little emo, i said don't shed no tears.. no emo no cry.
10th May 2011 6:16pm
And wouldn't it have been read sooo much better if this poem had started:
"hush little emo, i said don't shed no tears.. no emo no cry" rather than rolling out those tired tight jean sterotypes all the way to yawnville via Iraq.
"hush little emo, i said don't shed no tears.. no emo no cry" rather than rolling out those tired tight jean sterotypes all the way to yawnville via Iraq.
10th May 2011 10:36pm
maybe.. i'm not sure. how does it make you feel, would you like to lay on my couch?
10th May 2011 11:22pm
16th Feb 2013 11:39pm
really? really? really? -.- tellin people who are already depressed that no one gives a damn while using terrible rhymes smh...
