A Childlike Anixity

As a child
my mother would wave to me
through the classroom window
her lipstick stained lips
pressed against the glass
leaving a reminder
of safety and motherly love.

As she turned to leave through
the rusty metal gates
she would wave
she couldn't see me
but she knew I was watching
I did not want my mummy to leave
I wanted to be fed cotton wool
wrapped in a blanket
and protected from the cruelty
of this strange evil world.

Fast forward 25 years later
and no one is at that window anymore
as a adult
I sit at my desk daydreaming
of what might of been
flicking through
my Filofax of mistakes
shyly baring the scars
of my day to day struggles.

Mummy isn't here anymore
and no one can protect me,
I fall headfirst
into a oasis of infinity
with no one there to catch me.