innocence of the rotten

 
A few years ago, I wrote to a pen-pal
that had illness in her family,
to, as President Bush once famously said,
"Bring it on", I told the evil spirit that was laying
this family low, to turn his attention to me.

Well, it did.

I sensed the ominous dark creature
I became ill,
The evil force
far greater than myself,
had come to feed.

At some point I had to cut ties,
my promise of aid
and the beast passed over me.

That was a close call.

years later,
in my happy go lucky
on-line flirtations,
I realized I had
somehow laid myself wide open
vulnerable.
 
Something/someone
sucked the mojo right out of me

I became a toothless
100 something old man
in the blink of an eye

my former virile self
completely drained from me.

But I did not really feel like
"oh, woe is me", it was more like,
"Oh well, maybe they'll give it back when they are through"

but like the quote from an imaginary person,
" by the time you know evil, you are dead"

I Really do not know the wends and the ways of the
turbulent forces of darkness that wreak havoc on us all

The electrified forces probing me,
seeing if I would burst,
Then made it's way effortlessly
through the passages and people
I knew and know, like tentacles of a monstrous octopus
then out through all the people they knew,
until one,
until one was caught off guard
and cracked

Any crimes ever committed against me became mere child's play
compared to this monster
that when traveling through me
I became that monster

I refuse to plead innocent
And all I have to say is
 I am sorry.