Lighthouse

I had a dream once,
Waves were crashing on the shoreline
Big waves, grey waves, stormy waves.
The sky was dark
I had guessed it was dusk
But I wasn't sure.
I wasn't sure of anything back then.
For all I knew, it was the middle of the day.
There weren't any boats out,
The fishermen had stayed in with their families
Unaware of the lonely girl walking...

I was walking at an angle into the water.
My feet were just barely covered.
I was aimed in the direction of a lighthouse.
The beacon was so consistent,
It drew me.
The way it went round and round,
It made me feel safe.
The lighthouse was the strength I didn't have.
The lighthouse was everything I was,
And the beacon everything I wasn't.
I needed that lighthouse.
The water was up to my knees.
The lighthouse was so far away,
But I was sure I could reach it.
A great wave knocked me over.
I just got up and kept walking.
The water was cold.
So so cold.
It made me feel alert, and yet...
My brain was so fuzzy.
I could only focus on turf lighthouse.
It was all I wanted to focus on.
The water was level with my hips.
The lighthouse was getting closer.
It must have been.
I started feeling warm...
The lighthouse.
I needed that lighthouse.
I tripped.
There was a rock in the water.
It cut me, it was a long, thin cut.
I didn't feel it.
I only felt that draw..
A dire need of this lighthouse.
The water was up to my chest.
I had always loved lighthouses.
This one was just so right.
I needed that lighthouse.
It was the only thing keeping me going.
It had me entranced.
The water was up to my neck.
It was close.
The light had stopped shining in my eyes.
I could see the details.
Chin level with the water.
I kept going.

And going.

I never reached the lighthouse.
I was barely over halfway.
There was a drop off, and it was over.
I was weak, I was cold.
I couldn't fight.
I just gave in.

And then I woke up.