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� � � �< the hell of perfect round burgers >

     we're overcome
     with the long relationship
     of love
     with seeds
     from some new fruit
     bred
     recombinant

     kissing

     fucking

     dna

     the opposite
     to the hell of perfect round burgers frying deliciously
     the hell
     the opposite of winter
     loses count
     of your seeds
     the seeds i eat
     suck
     each one
     they've
     been growing in me for so long
     you'd think
     i was ready for birth
     or at least the pain

     i can smell you

     or

     maybe dream you

     off
     in another room
     taking a shit
     (even dreams have to shit)
     while i keep your shine in a velvet bag
     (the shine of still lakes in the moon)
     off
     in the hills
     (an old turtle sunning himself)
     while handfuls of us
     cascade
     through our mouths
     (we're coming like rain in a shower)
     like pomegranates
     pulled wide
     popping
     our jelly seeds

               - - -

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Written by rayheinrich

(Death Plane for Teddy)

Published 14th Feb 2011 | Edited 19th Feb 2011

All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.

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comments 6 reads 1231

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Comment

Anonymous

16th Feb 2011 8:28pm

Reading this poem reminds me of what you told me about how the snap back to reality I sometimes use can affect my poems in a negative way. If you'd ended this with something like "and then I woke up and you were making me eggs and I looked at your fat hairy thighs," it would have been a massive antimclimax. As it is, it's a beautiful whirpool of nonsense and lyricism. Just one grammatical nit: didn't you mean "loses count"?

rayheinrich (Death Plane for Teddy)

16th Feb 2011 9:47pm

   If you'd ended this with something like "and then I woke up and you were
   making me eggs and I looked at your fat hairy thighs," it would have
   been a massive anticlimax.

Your ending is so funny it would be worth it. So, this makes it an example of an
effective use of anticlimax, not a bad one. But, yeah, what I was talking about. :)

   As it is, it's a beautiful whirlpool of nonsense and lyricism.

Hey! That's "cryptic metaphor and lyricism". I'll have you know that anything I
write that seems like nonsense is *always* something the reader doesn't understand.
Go ahead, quote me something that seems like nonsense to you and I'll make up some
perfectly logical deep meaning (or two or three) complete with references to Wikipedia
to back it up. :)

   "When I use a word," Humpty Dumpty said in rather a scornful tone,
   "it means just what I choose it to mean -- neither more nor less."

   "The question is," said Alice, "whether you can make words mean so many different things."

   "The question is," said Humpty Dumpty, "which is to be master - - that's all."


   Just one grammatical nit: didn't you mean "loses count"?

I certainly did, corrected it, thanks.

Read poems by rayheinrich

Great.

PierreTheMad

16th Feb 2011 9:17pm

I love how you juxtapose beauty with gross reality. Even dreams have to shit. Fantastic. Right after you have engaged the sense of smell (the closest to taste) you then go for the kill with such foul imagery. Using this technique earlier in the piece and at the end gives the sweetness to wash away the nasty. No concept of what you speak but, sensually, a wonderful piece.