Outcast

 I had no place to go
The walls crumbled around me
That fatefull evening
I was told to let go
Of the things I held onto
And crying all the way out the door

The thunder and the rain
Were in their place that day
Surrounding me,drownding me
Beating me with their lightning
To the feeling that they
Were made for me that day

I prayed for the lightning to kill me
End me please from my agony
Destroy this unwanted person
This thorn in everyones side
Get rid of me and toss me in the ditch
Who would care?

I cried so much to the point of blood
I tried my best But failed
I always tried for them
Leaving myself last in line
Wasnt that enough?

What more did I need to do for others?
What more did they want from me?
Wasnt it enough that I was a good person?
Wasnt it enough that I did try?
Wasnt it enough that I loved them?

I cant think of turning back to tell them this
Seems they didnt want me anyways
Ill have to force my heart to press on
Oh please God put hooks in my mouth
And turn be back. I dont want to go

All I ever hope for was a better life for them
All I ever prayed was the best for them
So I had to reach into my heart
And turn the screw
And move forward,to wherever I must go


I felt my feet were in cement
It was hard to walk away
But the opposition didnt care
It just pressed on,driving me away
The feeling of my chest giving in
And my heart pounding,my throat closed
And I couldnt stop the tears
And the rain
And the pain

As I walked away