deepundergroundpoetry.com
You'll need to get to know your houses
1. The fourth house
In the fourth house
there is a definite darkness
I'm almost certain
that it rolled out from the hearth of it
and clung to the floors, walls and ceilings
because when the doors slam
the rooms wheeze like tar clogged lungs
and all those who dwell there
are weighted down by the black holes
that the darkness spits on them
there is blood here
but it's the thinnest of them all
I've seen it, seen them welcome in a stranger
and even though their lips smiled
their eyes flashed of imminent danger, the flash gone
there were no more warnings
and they made bits of him, taxed him coin and soul
then drained him of himself
Written by
lepperochan
(Craic-Dealer)
Published 27th Sep 2013
| Edited 29th Sep 2013
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 16
reading list entries 2
comments 31
reads 1260
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Re: you'll need get to know your houses 1. The fourth
27th Sep 2013 1:47am
DAMN! a punch to the gut if one doesn't take heed and see the picture. wow. love it.
1
re: Re: you'll need get to know your houses 1. The fo
29th Sep 2013 00:57am
ah, hullo there Satan
I like the way you're thinking
thank you kindly dear lady, for dropping by and leaving your words
I like the way you're thinking
thank you kindly dear lady, for dropping by and leaving your words
Re: you'll need get to know your houses 1. The fourth
Anonymous
27th Sep 2013 2:02am
Need more...
0
re: Re: you'll need get to know your houses 1. The fo
29th Sep 2013 00:59am
hey,
thanks, I've put a couple of more stanzas on the end, I hope it all makes a bit more sense now
thanks for dropping in and leaving your honesty
thanks, I've put a couple of more stanzas on the end, I hope it all makes a bit more sense now
thanks for dropping in and leaving your honesty
re: re: Re: you'll need get to know your houses 1. Th
Anonymous
29th Sep 2013 1:15am
It made sense before, but yes, I know this house...
1
Re: you'll need get to know your houses 1. The fourth
Anonymous
27th Sep 2013 2:15am
So mysterious, I have to agree with Petit, it makes us crave for more and the last three lines are certainly dark enough to leave a dark hole in our minds.
Most definitely intriguing!
Most definitely intriguing!
1
re: Re: you'll need get to know your houses 1. The fo
29th Sep 2013 1:01am
hey
crave no more Vee, there's a couple of more words there for you, I hope they measure up to the rest of it.
happy to have grabbed your intrigue gland, and cheers for the visit and thoughts
crave no more Vee, there's a couple of more words there for you, I hope they measure up to the rest of it.
happy to have grabbed your intrigue gland, and cheers for the visit and thoughts
Re: you'll need get to know your houses 1. The fourth
Anonymous
27th Sep 2013 8:34am
Behind closed doors indeed, the darkness that dwells behind them. Unsettled me, which in my mind means this was a success.
1
re: Re: you'll need get to know your houses 1. The fo
29th Sep 2013 1:09am
Missy
terrible sorry for the unsettling, well leaning a little bit towards thinking about whether I should be sorry
some houses are fascinating, some you can feel the badness in them, and some you can feel the peace.
Thank you kindly for dropping by and leaving your brain print
terrible sorry for the unsettling, well leaning a little bit towards thinking about whether I should be sorry
some houses are fascinating, some you can feel the badness in them, and some you can feel the peace.
Thank you kindly for dropping by and leaving your brain print
Re: you'll need get to know your houses 1. The fourth
27th Sep 2013 11:44am
Definitely left me uneasy... I'm not one to bang on ominous looking doors, but if it means another poem, I might.
The title is confusing, but perhaps that was your intention.
Thanks for the peek into darkness.
The title is confusing, but perhaps that was your intention.
Thanks for the peek into darkness.
1
re: Re: you'll need get to know your houses 1. The fo
29th Sep 2013 1:13am
Tack
I've changed the title round a tiny bit, I hope it makes more sense now
I'm more of a "oh, ..it's an ominous looking door, maybe I shouldn't go in ...but hey, what's the worst that can happen"
thank you kindly for parachuting in and leaving your words
I've changed the title round a tiny bit, I hope it makes more sense now
I'm more of a "oh, ..it's an ominous looking door, maybe I shouldn't go in ...but hey, what's the worst that can happen"
thank you kindly for parachuting in and leaving your words
Re: you'll need get to know your houses 1. The fourth
I love the morose description of the house!
I'm hacking up phlegm, respectively.
I'm hacking up phlegm, respectively.
1
re: Re: you'll need get to know your houses 1. The fo
29th Sep 2013 1:15am
A.R
welcome. "I'm hacking up phlegm, respectively" that has to be the most original compliment I've seen
welcome to this place and thanks for stopping by here and leaving your words
welcome. "I'm hacking up phlegm, respectively" that has to be the most original compliment I've seen
welcome to this place and thanks for stopping by here and leaving your words
Re: Re: you'll need get to know your houses 1. The fo
5th Oct 2020 6:53am
Re: yo know yo hoses 1. The froth hose
27th Sep 2013 3:48pm
nice
gave me a perverse
mo[u]rning
chu
kle............
call theeXterminator....& the vinyl-siding guy!
gave me a perverse
mo[u]rning
chu
kle............
call theeXterminator....& the vinyl-siding guy!
1
re: Re: yo know yo hoses 1. The froth hose
29th Sep 2013 1:22am
I really wasn't sure anyone would get this, well the first draft that you saw. haha, fair fkn play to you Danny Bhoy
thanks for the drop by and words sir
thanks for the drop by and words sir
Re: you'll need to get to know your houses 1. The fou
27th Sep 2013 6:35pm
Indeed creepy and holds picture upon much...hope the light shines soon!!!
Excellent Write Sir!!!
Excellent Write Sir!!!
1
re: Re: you'll need to get to know your houses 1. The
29th Sep 2013 1:26am
souladareatease
cheers man, every now n then I go to the dark side and try and find a few words there, it seems this time I've found a dew good ones
thanks for coming by and leaving your thoughts
cheers man, every now n then I go to the dark side and try and find a few words there, it seems this time I've found a dew good ones
thanks for coming by and leaving your thoughts
Re: You'll need to get to know your houses
My goodness. Tight is the word.
"tar clogged lungs", "wheeze" ... that line is utterly perfect.
The poem, for me, fits tightly around that; a real
sense of density. "Spits" is suitably crude/thick (like tar).
It just throws all that weight on you, keeps your chest
on the floor. Good stuff, Eamonn.
V
"tar clogged lungs", "wheeze" ... that line is utterly perfect.
The poem, for me, fits tightly around that; a real
sense of density. "Spits" is suitably crude/thick (like tar).
It just throws all that weight on you, keeps your chest
on the floor. Good stuff, Eamonn.
V
1
re: Re: You'll need to get to know your houses
29th Sep 2013 1:35am
we've been through this V, tight is not the word. haven't you heard? why, everybody's heard that the bird is the word "Mm ma ma oooh mou mou.."
I'm loving your analysis. it's great to read why somethings works for a person, the way you've explained makes a lot of sense.I was really happy when I thought of that line so I'm glad you liked it too.
thank you kindly for dropping by dear lady, for the words too
I'm loving your analysis. it's great to read why somethings works for a person, the way you've explained makes a lot of sense.I was really happy when I thought of that line so I'm glad you liked it too.
thank you kindly for dropping by dear lady, for the words too
Re: You'll need to get to know your houses
29th Sep 2013 00:52am
re: Re: You'll need to get to know your houses
29th Sep 2013 1:13am
Re: You'll need to get to know your houses
30th Sep 2013 6:00am
Sounds like the movie I've seen some years back, can't remember the title though. Grim and proper for the coming holiday...looking forward for three more poems: the third, second and first houses! I bet they're going to get grimmer and more blood-soaked tales!
1
re: Re: You'll need to get to know your houses
14th Oct 2013 00:04am
D_Poet
I'll not say you haven't tempted me to go darker, but it wouldn't be right. perhaps all will become clearer when we peek through the other keyholes
thanks kindly for dropping in good sir, appreciate your words
I'll not say you haven't tempted me to go darker, but it wouldn't be right. perhaps all will become clearer when we peek through the other keyholes
thanks kindly for dropping in good sir, appreciate your words
Re: You'll need to get to know your houses
Anonymous
20th Oct 2013 10:00pm
A nice evocation of mysterious, enveloping evil, with some wonderfully elegant lines. It's almost Poe-like in its quiet intensity. My only quibble would be that its threat is a bit too vague, but that's it. JMHO, of course. Thank you for the read.
1
re: Re: You'll need to get to know your houses
Jack me boy, sorry I missed this
Thanks, I do believe that's a trio of great poets you've linked me to over the past couple of years. thanks for that, and thanks for all of it, your eyes ears and suggestions. I really wouldn't be half of anything legible if it weren't for your council.
The threat is vague, I reckon that's pretty dangerous in fairness. ;)
edit: ah yes, I see now where you're coming from
Thanks, I do believe that's a trio of great poets you've linked me to over the past couple of years. thanks for that, and thanks for all of it, your eyes ears and suggestions. I really wouldn't be half of anything legible if it weren't for your council.
The threat is vague, I reckon that's pretty dangerous in fairness. ;)
edit: ah yes, I see now where you're coming from
Re: You'll need to get to know your houses
2nd Nov 2013 8:07pm
From the outside this piece looks harmless, but after reading it a few times, with each read I definitely sensed an uneasy sinking within.
I think it must be something to do with throwing the reader... "in the fourth." The piece reminded me of a book I started reading "House of Leaves." You created this slow unwinding of detail, suggesting something sinister deep inside.
Great writing, Craic, I really enjoyed.
I think it must be something to do with throwing the reader... "in the fourth." The piece reminded me of a book I started reading "House of Leaves." You created this slow unwinding of detail, suggesting something sinister deep inside.
Great writing, Craic, I really enjoyed.
1
re: Re: You'll need to get to know your houses
2nd Nov 2013 9:51pm
Mr Case (good job your name isn't Justin)
The key into this lies in the couplet in the middle. if you can understand what that says or figure out who I'm talking to from the title, then it'll seem so easy you'll be kicking yourself.
Thanks for dropping by and leaving your thoughts Mr Case
The key into this lies in the couplet in the middle. if you can understand what that says or figure out who I'm talking to from the title, then it'll seem so easy you'll be kicking yourself.
Thanks for dropping by and leaving your thoughts Mr Case
Re: You'll need to get to know your houses
28th Jun 2014 9:54pm
Beware where you decide to dwell, for the evil there may consume you. I enjoyed it.
0
Re: You'll need to get to know your houses
2nd Jul 2014 9:58am
thank you kindly Xmar. a house and its particular or collective personalities can make for a less than comfy stay
kind words sir,thanks much
kind words sir,thanks much
Re. You'll need to get to know your houses
28th May 2016 7:30pm
You'll need to get to know your houses .. .
Can we have some of this?
please?
yes, ok good.
-Howlings
Can we have some of this?
please?
yes, ok good.
-Howlings
1