War

My time is up.
It's all over now.
There was only one way up.
But there was never any way down.

The water is rising around me.
And below me there's one hundred feet down.
Of nothing but air.
And then, of course, there's the cold hard ground.

Darkness is all I see.
Am I dead?
Or is this me?
The only option I have is to beg and plead.

And to hope that what I'm seeing isn't me.
To hope that I'm just seeing what I used to be.
And not who I am now.
But it's hard to focus with the crowd cheering so loud.
Down below.
One hundred feet down.

I lose my balance.
And therefore I lost the challenge.
I can't face myself all alone.
At least not with some help.

I'll accept defeat for now.
But I'll be back before the final count down.
And secure my victory.
In this internal war.
And turn my life around.