Submissions by no-end-to-eldorado
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Poet Introduction
Rants and raves about what I feel is important, going somewhere but not quite there yet.
The last time
This is the last time I come home coked up and angry and fall asleep in the garden. This is the last time I spend £50 on a night out. This is the last time I buy cigarettes. This is the last time I break things on my walk home just because I can. This is the last time I hug & shake hands with a stranger because he has sold me drugs. This is the last time I buy shots. This is the last time I watch the chef throw up because he is drunk. This is the last time I keep my parents awake all night because they are worried about me. This is the last time I start a fight with a stranger. This is...
704 reads
1 Comment
I close my eyes and reach
I close my eyes and reach out for you.
My hands meet nothing.
I open and realise you are miles away,
Like the sea from a distant tower,
An isolated land, away on the horizon.
A fleeting illusion I want to be true,
One that never was.
And if I think otherwise I am fooling myself,
Spinning my mind into another ravine,
Losing myself in a labyrinth of remorse and regret,
An ocean of complaint,
One that gets me nowhere but,
One step behind,
One step closer to someone I don't want to be.
A pathetic shell,
A waste...
My hands meet nothing.
I open and realise you are miles away,
Like the sea from a distant tower,
An isolated land, away on the horizon.
A fleeting illusion I want to be true,
One that never was.
And if I think otherwise I am fooling myself,
Spinning my mind into another ravine,
Losing myself in a labyrinth of remorse and regret,
An ocean of complaint,
One that gets me nowhere but,
One step behind,
One step closer to someone I don't want to be.
A pathetic shell,
A waste...
581 reads
0 Comments
Disaster Button
I have a button I like to press,
When everything is a bit too hard, a bit too ordinary.
Its called the auto-destruct and happens about six drinks in.
And I sit there and cry,
And feel pathetic.
And I shout at everyone I know,
And I break everything I see,
And blame everybody else,
For my own shortcomings.
Its a mental block I need to get over,
And happens once every six months,
Sometimes more, sometimes less.
But I always feel better after,
Having had a good cry.
I realise life isn’t that bad,
And my hangover sedates...
When everything is a bit too hard, a bit too ordinary.
Its called the auto-destruct and happens about six drinks in.
And I sit there and cry,
And feel pathetic.
And I shout at everyone I know,
And I break everything I see,
And blame everybody else,
For my own shortcomings.
Its a mental block I need to get over,
And happens once every six months,
Sometimes more, sometimes less.
But I always feel better after,
Having had a good cry.
I realise life isn’t that bad,
And my hangover sedates...
550 reads
0 Comments
Who I see in the mirror
You sit there with your retarded fucking face and all I want to do is to hit you, to wipe the life from your body and the smile from your face. And you scream and shout like no-ones listening when we have all grown tired of your complaining. The height of indecency, the epitome of rudeness crosses my mind as you start to tell the same story you have told for a thousand years, the same story nobody wants to hear. And we make excuses for your behavior, tell ourselves that's just the way you are but being a cunt is a choice and you know it. And the anger will rise in my chest and seep into my...
657 reads
2 Comments
Forever England
While there is still air in my lungs, sweat on my brow and
blood in my veins,
While I can still see the stars in the sky, feel the cold on
my skin and the dirt underneath my feet,
While I can still feel the beat of the drum in my heart and
hear the songs that are sung.
I know I will be forever England.
blood in my veins,
While I can still see the stars in the sky, feel the cold on
my skin and the dirt underneath my feet,
While I can still feel the beat of the drum in my heart and
hear the songs that are sung.
I know I will be forever England.
740 reads
0 Comments
I wonder what happened to you
I wonder what happened to you,
That made you build up all those walls.
I wonder what happened to you,
To fuck up your mind beyond recall.
You can't have been born with it,
It's something you learnt.
I wonder if the church did it,
With all its conditions and terms.
And you can sometimes deal with it,
At least to the outward eye.
But when shit hits the fan and hits it hard,
You crumple and run and hide.
Built out of your own insecurities,
It makes me...
That made you build up all those walls.
I wonder what happened to you,
To fuck up your mind beyond recall.
You can't have been born with it,
It's something you learnt.
I wonder if the church did it,
With all its conditions and terms.
And you can sometimes deal with it,
At least to the outward eye.
But when shit hits the fan and hits it hard,
You crumple and run and hide.
Built out of your own insecurities,
It makes me...
676 reads
0 Comments
Details of a man
He opened the door quietly but made his precense known,
Wiped his feet on the door mat and hung up his coat.
He's two hours early, ain't that a surprise,
But his afternoon nap was cut short by the DT's and his need to anaestetize.
He is humble, he is gentle, though he reeks of gin,
And his hands won't stop shaking, no matter what he drinks.
And his family don't know what to say, to this great man in his state,
And they know time is running thin, but the words won't come out.
And all these things build up an image of just one man,
The details,...
Wiped his feet on the door mat and hung up his coat.
He's two hours early, ain't that a surprise,
But his afternoon nap was cut short by the DT's and his need to anaestetize.
He is humble, he is gentle, though he reeks of gin,
And his hands won't stop shaking, no matter what he drinks.
And his family don't know what to say, to this great man in his state,
And they know time is running thin, but the words won't come out.
And all these things build up an image of just one man,
The details,...
611 reads
0 Comments
Deep in your eyes.
I'd like to loose myself somehow,
In space as well as time.
Like when I'm high and listening to music,
Or looking deep into your eyes
In space as well as time.
Like when I'm high and listening to music,
Or looking deep into your eyes
694 reads
1 Comment
Take my bones
Take my bone, my body, my flesh and form it into what you most desire.
Take my brain, my liver, my lungs and mash them into a paste.
Take my tendons, my hairs and my nails and crush them to a powder.
But my eyes will forever see your hatred, disguised as lust and fun.
And my heart will forever feel your sadness, disguised as confidence and laughter.
And my soul will forever pity you, stuck as you are behind plaster.
And I will not wait, for I deserve better.
And I will only try so much, before I tire of your games.
And I will feel only sadness if...
Take my brain, my liver, my lungs and mash them into a paste.
Take my tendons, my hairs and my nails and crush them to a powder.
But my eyes will forever see your hatred, disguised as lust and fun.
And my heart will forever feel your sadness, disguised as confidence and laughter.
And my soul will forever pity you, stuck as you are behind plaster.
And I will not wait, for I deserve better.
And I will only try so much, before I tire of your games.
And I will feel only sadness if...
708 reads
3 Comments
You only call me when you're high.
Everything is breathing, everything is moving,
And splendid white you told me,
Childlike in this space and time.
And you seemed to be having problems hearing me,
Scared by the cops,
Scared by the drugs.
And sometimes it feels like you only want me when your tripping.
You only call me when your high.
And I'm far too nice to you than you deserve,
Far too kind than you pretend.
And I'm not going to try and explain how your mind works,
With its mashed spaghetti and pieces of plastic,
You seem to change with...
And splendid white you told me,
Childlike in this space and time.
And you seemed to be having problems hearing me,
Scared by the cops,
Scared by the drugs.
And sometimes it feels like you only want me when your tripping.
You only call me when your high.
And I'm far too nice to you than you deserve,
Far too kind than you pretend.
And I'm not going to try and explain how your mind works,
With its mashed spaghetti and pieces of plastic,
You seem to change with...
743 reads
4 Comments
Gone tomorrow
I have been changing, becoming who I am for far too long
now.
I have been crawling, tearing up the carpet, searching for
what it is that makes me whole.
And I keep finding people ready to hurt me, ready to kick me
to the dust.
And I have been looking to my heart for the reasons and
crying out in pain.
And I've been reaching out for sweet sounds and phrases built
to keep me sane.
And when its all too much the auto-destruct is far too close.
To break down and burn the bridges I have fought to defend,
To cut out the reason and blindly...
now.
I have been crawling, tearing up the carpet, searching for
what it is that makes me whole.
And I keep finding people ready to hurt me, ready to kick me
to the dust.
And I have been looking to my heart for the reasons and
crying out in pain.
And I've been reaching out for sweet sounds and phrases built
to keep me sane.
And when its all too much the auto-destruct is far too close.
To break down and burn the bridges I have fought to defend,
To cut out the reason and blindly...
640 reads
2 Comments
DU Poetry : Submissions by no-end-to-eldorado
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