Submissions by lonelybride (Alexa Jayde)
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Poet Introduction
I am insane.
How I Feel About "Depression"
Depression, a word commonly used by teenagers who just can't understand their changing body functions, so they rule it off as being depressed
Because what? you sleep a lot? you eat a lot? You can't control your emotions sometimes? Ever heard of puberty and the human body's functions?
Depression to me, a nineteen year old who still doesn't know much about the world..
Depression to me is like a piggy bank
One of the ones that you put money into
And put money into
Until one day
You need all of the money you've been saving up
And so you have to smash it
Smash...
Because what? you sleep a lot? you eat a lot? You can't control your emotions sometimes? Ever heard of puberty and the human body's functions?
Depression to me, a nineteen year old who still doesn't know much about the world..
Depression to me is like a piggy bank
One of the ones that you put money into
And put money into
Until one day
You need all of the money you've been saving up
And so you have to smash it
Smash...
873 reads
3 Comments
Him
And that was it
I realized the one simple fact I had been forgetting
When I am sober
You are my every thought
You are every bit of pollution I am breathing in
You are, without a doubt, every clouded dream I have as soon as I hit the pillow
And there is only one way to get rid of you
I have to drown my thoughts in toxins that kill the flowers growing in my mind
Try to breathe in new pollution that puts out the brightness of the stars in my throat
And as for the dreams, they have turned into beautiful nightmares that wake me up to cry in the middle of the...
I realized the one simple fact I had been forgetting
When I am sober
You are my every thought
You are every bit of pollution I am breathing in
You are, without a doubt, every clouded dream I have as soon as I hit the pillow
And there is only one way to get rid of you
I have to drown my thoughts in toxins that kill the flowers growing in my mind
Try to breathe in new pollution that puts out the brightness of the stars in my throat
And as for the dreams, they have turned into beautiful nightmares that wake me up to cry in the middle of the...
644 reads
0 Comments
To be me
A writer doesn't sit in darkness and wonder what to say next
Just as a lover doesn't have trouble keeping themselves from feeling hate toward another
Because to be a writer, you must always have something to say
To be a lover, you must always love
I have thus come to the conclusion that to be me
Means to constantly hide in fear that you'll never be good enough
To second guess your decisions, actions, words
To be me means to joke so lightly about how alone you're always going to be
But it's only a joke to everyone else
To be me is to wish to be anyone else...
Just as a lover doesn't have trouble keeping themselves from feeling hate toward another
Because to be a writer, you must always have something to say
To be a lover, you must always love
I have thus come to the conclusion that to be me
Means to constantly hide in fear that you'll never be good enough
To second guess your decisions, actions, words
To be me means to joke so lightly about how alone you're always going to be
But it's only a joke to everyone else
To be me is to wish to be anyone else...
613 reads
1 Comment
when
you go through so much shit
to find the one person you're maybe going to spend the rest of your life with
at what point is it not worth it anymore?
at what point do you just give up and decide to live alone?
to keep yourself from hurting so badly.
to keep yourself from poisoning your body with the words they've said to you.
drinking down their sentences.
snorting their opinions.
shooting up the lies you've made yourself believe.
when do you stop?
to find the one person you're maybe going to spend the rest of your life with
at what point is it not worth it anymore?
at what point do you just give up and decide to live alone?
to keep yourself from hurting so badly.
to keep yourself from poisoning your body with the words they've said to you.
drinking down their sentences.
snorting their opinions.
shooting up the lies you've made yourself believe.
when do you stop?
646 reads
1 Comment
Battles.
I already feel as if I am in love with you. I just can't tell you that. That would be, well, mad. You'd paint me as the type of person to fall in love easily. You'd color me as the type to throw love around, but I have never loved another as I love you at this very moment. It is so hard to see how you mean so much to me, and at this time you probably shouldn't. Though, I cannot help what I am feeling, and I know what I am feeling. I feel as if my heart is just waiting for the rest of me to catch up. It's in constant battle with my brain over whether I should tell you how I am feeling, or just...
601 reads
0 Comments
Castles.
Though I'm a princess
The battle is different
You rescue me from myself
So I don't become distant
The castle walls,
They conceal secrets..
The corridors,
They're filled with regrets.
And in the room
In which I am found
All the thoughts
Of myself are bound.
And you must rush to get to me
Before the voice consumes
Or hear the gunshot ringing
Throughout the castles rooms.
The battle is different
You rescue me from myself
So I don't become distant
The castle walls,
They conceal secrets..
The corridors,
They're filled with regrets.
And in the room
In which I am found
All the thoughts
Of myself are bound.
And you must rush to get to me
Before the voice consumes
Or hear the gunshot ringing
Throughout the castles rooms.
553 reads
0 Comments
Help Me Out
How are you living?
Everyone asks.
Let me explain.
Please, it's simple.
My world is crashing, burning,
Everything is turning.
Outside is destroyed,
Uranium bombs deployed,
That's how I'm living.. In Hell.
Everyone asks.
Let me explain.
Please, it's simple.
My world is crashing, burning,
Everything is turning.
Outside is destroyed,
Uranium bombs deployed,
That's how I'm living.. In Hell.
712 reads
3 Comments
Thinking
Sometimes I think,
Yet, my own thoughts I can't follow.
Often I drink,
But it doesn't help my sorrow.
Sometimes I wonder why.
Often, do I cry.
Yet I still think,
My unfollowed thoughts.
My heart breaks easily,
The tape doesn't hold.
Please tell me why,
Why are you being so cold?
I wish you could open your eyes,
Maybe then you'll see.
You're my life, my love,
You mean the universe to me.
Yet, my own thoughts I can't follow.
Often I drink,
But it doesn't help my sorrow.
Sometimes I wonder why.
Often, do I cry.
Yet I still think,
My unfollowed thoughts.
My heart breaks easily,
The tape doesn't hold.
Please tell me why,
Why are you being so cold?
I wish you could open your eyes,
Maybe then you'll see.
You're my life, my love,
You mean the universe to me.
786 reads
2 Comments
Suicide Note
Lying here waiting for dawn to break,
where my last dying breath I’ll take.
You should’ve listened to me, you see,
now you know it was getting to me.
I’m sorry my mother, father, and friends,
really sorry that this must end.
You never really helped me through,
guess you could say I’m blaming this on you.
Tell the police this is my death note,
say these are the words I wrote.
The last things I thought of now said out loud,
I can actually say, I’m rather proud.
My efforts to try and get you to understand,
now...
where my last dying breath I’ll take.
You should’ve listened to me, you see,
now you know it was getting to me.
I’m sorry my mother, father, and friends,
really sorry that this must end.
You never really helped me through,
guess you could say I’m blaming this on you.
Tell the police this is my death note,
say these are the words I wrote.
The last things I thought of now said out loud,
I can actually say, I’m rather proud.
My efforts to try and get you to understand,
now...
825 reads
2 Comments
Only Ever Once
It's a once in a lifetime feeling.
The one you get when you like someone a lot,
But words just can't explain it..
I love you doesn't cover how happy I am to be yours,
I care isn't enough to show how much you really mean to me..
Not any emotion, nor word can describe how I feel about you..
SO I am writing this poem to try and sum up how I feel..
But not even this is god enough for someone as special...
As You <3
The one you get when you like someone a lot,
But words just can't explain it..
I love you doesn't cover how happy I am to be yours,
I care isn't enough to show how much you really mean to me..
Not any emotion, nor word can describe how I feel about you..
SO I am writing this poem to try and sum up how I feel..
But not even this is god enough for someone as special...
As You <3
812 reads
1 Comment
Voices
The screams in my head,
they torture me...
The cuts on my arms,
they make it go away...
Can't you see,
What this world has made of me?
Look what has happened!
I want to be gone...
Take my soul..
Rising demons..
Never let it go...
Take my life..
I'm Gone.
they torture me...
The cuts on my arms,
they make it go away...
Can't you see,
What this world has made of me?
Look what has happened!
I want to be gone...
Take my soul..
Rising demons..
Never let it go...
Take my life..
I'm Gone.
912 reads
4 Comments
AS Night Falls
the blood sheds as i go to bed
the demons know what I've said
"Come To Me" Thats what he said
Go to bed and rest your head...
- Devon
the demons know what I've said
"Come To Me" Thats what he said
Go to bed and rest your head...
- Devon
1176 reads
0 Comments
DU Poetry : Submissions by lonelybride (Alexa Jayde)