Poetry competition CLOSED 11th July 2018 00:31am
WINNER
LunasChild8
LunasChild8
RUNNER-UP:
ReggiePoet
I am in such anguish that I could die
Anonymous
Poetry Contest Description
Write a poem in any style talking about deep affliction. It can reflect your true experience or a true story of someone you know of. No names allowed, unless it regards yourself. Any length. The winner will be chosen by voting, as I will be participating.
You are allowed a max of three poems. Poems can be new or chosen amongst those you have already written. I ask those responsable for the site to please oversea this competition and ensure that rules be respected and to oversea the public vote. Dear poets let your heart do the talking. Thank you. Juvenalis66
In the Deep
He wrote, “I am the captain of my soul!”
But Henley steered a much more noble helm!
The schooner that I steer tacks near sheol
My soul has foundered in this murky realm!
Most fearful dreams appear here in the deep
Where, undisturbed, malignant spirits lie
The secrets of the sea, forever sleep
Unseen, except by lost and damn’ed eyes
My fate was bought and sealed so long ago
And naught can change it now, unless by chance
My soul, by favored winds who deign to blow
Reprieve my way, may lift my circumstance!
Once overwhelmed by doubt and ghastly fears
Shall I evade the place of wrath and tears?
Written by ReggiePoet
(Reggie)
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Why?
Why do you continue to act this way?
Doesn’t it bother you when your mother cries?
Please listen to what I have to say,
It might just save your life.
Why do you hang out with the wrong crowd?
You know your mother doesn’t approve of them.
It’s like your head is up in the clouds,
You do exactly what your mother condemns.
Why do you put yourself in a vulnerable state?
Do you not realize the consequences?
With our “nagging” you may feel hate,
We’re just trying to make you cautious.
Why do you push away your loved ones?
Is this your way of rebelling?
The beginning of the end has begun,
Do you realize that it’s your soul you’re selling?
Why do you turn a blind eye to your mother’s pain?
As her flesh and blood, your wrongs are her suffering.
We’re fighting hard for you to regain,
Your high post before you went under.
Why can’t you see the abyss you willingly entered?
What happened to the good girl I once knew?
I had hoped that I could play the role as your mentor,
But you had already bit off more than you could chew.
Why can’t you see that you’re hurting your mother?
She cares so much about you.
There’s no one else who would rather,
Take the suffering for you.
The ultimate question that ponders our mind,
The warning signs that met our blind eye.
Where did things go wrong?
Why do you feel like this is where you belong?
Why?
Why??
Why??!
Doesn’t it bother you when your mother cries?
Please listen to what I have to say,
It might just save your life.
Why do you hang out with the wrong crowd?
You know your mother doesn’t approve of them.
It’s like your head is up in the clouds,
You do exactly what your mother condemns.
Why do you put yourself in a vulnerable state?
Do you not realize the consequences?
With our “nagging” you may feel hate,
We’re just trying to make you cautious.
Why do you push away your loved ones?
Is this your way of rebelling?
The beginning of the end has begun,
Do you realize that it’s your soul you’re selling?
Why do you turn a blind eye to your mother’s pain?
As her flesh and blood, your wrongs are her suffering.
We’re fighting hard for you to regain,
Your high post before you went under.
Why can’t you see the abyss you willingly entered?
What happened to the good girl I once knew?
I had hoped that I could play the role as your mentor,
But you had already bit off more than you could chew.
Why can’t you see that you’re hurting your mother?
She cares so much about you.
There’s no one else who would rather,
Take the suffering for you.
The ultimate question that ponders our mind,
The warning signs that met our blind eye.
Where did things go wrong?
Why do you feel like this is where you belong?
Why?
Why??
Why??!
Written by LunasChild8
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Things I'll Never Say
I
Her soul was once a radiant fire
But now nearly all her flames have turned to ember
Her head-strong approach was something I’ve always admired
Yet now it seems like she has surrendered…
To despair and anxiety after five gruesome years
I watch on helplessly as I don’t know what to do
How can I assure her that there’s nothing to fear?
Whenever she asks me what our future holds, I haven’t got a clue
There are moments where I see determination in her worn eyes
But those days are rarer and rarer
Many days all I want to do is cry
We wouldn’t be in this situation if life had been fairer
All her life has been one struggle after another
But she managed to push on by working like heck
I love her so, oh my poor, dear mother
I fear that I’ll be the cause of her premature death.
II
Emptiness inside
I didn’t want to believe
That this is the final goodbye
Between you and me
I miss you Leo
Why did you have to go?
You, mom and I were the Golden Trio
Yet your life was cut short like one would blow…
Out a candle to extinguish its flames
Yet you, my dear cat, were hit by a car
That heart-stopping text from dad engulfed me in rage
And those unbelievable words had sown onto my heart a scar
Sometimes I dream of you, and I’m so happy
Only to wake up to reality, and I burst into tears
These last 10 months without you have been utterly crappy
Your affectionate personality filled our lives with cheer
Emptiness inside
I’ve now come to terms
That this is the final goodbye
The lack of a pulse and your immobile chest were enough to confirm.
III
I know I haven’t been the most worshipping of Christians
Only recently have I come to terms with my spirituality
Honestly, I thought that your existence was pure fiction
Yet my life experience led me to believe that your existence could be a reality
After all, you saved my mother when she was in death’s clutches
You have made it possible for me to accomplish my dream
Whenever I was done, you have been my pair of crutches
So please help me now, or I’ll burst out and scream
I’ve made a terrible choice, that shouldn’t have been so if life were different
I went all in instead of fully analyzing and opting for the safer path
I know that my face is often blank, making people think that I’m indifferent
When really, it’s my only way of protecting myself from attack
I didn’t sign up to pay this terrible price
This never would have happened had the opportunity exited back home
I had no one at the time to give me much needed advice
I feel like I’ve screwed up just as badly as the fall of Rome
So, God, Forces of the universe, my Guardian Angel
Please help my bearer and I to make it out of this shitstorm
This experience has left me rather gainful…
In what I should and shouldn’t do; I’m now informed
But I swear that I’ll bring us to the light at the end of the tunnel; no matter how painful.
Her soul was once a radiant fire
But now nearly all her flames have turned to ember
Her head-strong approach was something I’ve always admired
Yet now it seems like she has surrendered…
To despair and anxiety after five gruesome years
I watch on helplessly as I don’t know what to do
How can I assure her that there’s nothing to fear?
Whenever she asks me what our future holds, I haven’t got a clue
There are moments where I see determination in her worn eyes
But those days are rarer and rarer
Many days all I want to do is cry
We wouldn’t be in this situation if life had been fairer
All her life has been one struggle after another
But she managed to push on by working like heck
I love her so, oh my poor, dear mother
I fear that I’ll be the cause of her premature death.
II
Emptiness inside
I didn’t want to believe
That this is the final goodbye
Between you and me
I miss you Leo
Why did you have to go?
You, mom and I were the Golden Trio
Yet your life was cut short like one would blow…
Out a candle to extinguish its flames
Yet you, my dear cat, were hit by a car
That heart-stopping text from dad engulfed me in rage
And those unbelievable words had sown onto my heart a scar
Sometimes I dream of you, and I’m so happy
Only to wake up to reality, and I burst into tears
These last 10 months without you have been utterly crappy
Your affectionate personality filled our lives with cheer
Emptiness inside
I’ve now come to terms
That this is the final goodbye
The lack of a pulse and your immobile chest were enough to confirm.
III
I know I haven’t been the most worshipping of Christians
Only recently have I come to terms with my spirituality
Honestly, I thought that your existence was pure fiction
Yet my life experience led me to believe that your existence could be a reality
After all, you saved my mother when she was in death’s clutches
You have made it possible for me to accomplish my dream
Whenever I was done, you have been my pair of crutches
So please help me now, or I’ll burst out and scream
I’ve made a terrible choice, that shouldn’t have been so if life were different
I went all in instead of fully analyzing and opting for the safer path
I know that my face is often blank, making people think that I’m indifferent
When really, it’s my only way of protecting myself from attack
I didn’t sign up to pay this terrible price
This never would have happened had the opportunity exited back home
I had no one at the time to give me much needed advice
I feel like I’ve screwed up just as badly as the fall of Rome
So, God, Forces of the universe, my Guardian Angel
Please help my bearer and I to make it out of this shitstorm
This experience has left me rather gainful…
In what I should and shouldn’t do; I’m now informed
But I swear that I’ll bring us to the light at the end of the tunnel; no matter how painful.
Written by LunasChild8
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Hollow Shell
This is it; I’m done
My heart still beats, yet no warmth flows through my veins
My face is an emotionless mask, and I feel nothing inside
Tears pour from my eyes, yet they offer no relief
From the pain and torment I’ve subjected myself to
Life is cruel, and I’m merely one of its foolish victims
I’ve irrevocably damaged the lives of the people who matter to me
No matter what I say or do, I can never make up for it
I’m in a dark and unstable place
I can’t find the light and set myself free
Life isn’t worth living with this pain I’m going through
So why not just end it all with two momentary pains?
And watch my life bleed out of this hollow shell of the person I once was.
My heart still beats, yet no warmth flows through my veins
My face is an emotionless mask, and I feel nothing inside
Tears pour from my eyes, yet they offer no relief
From the pain and torment I’ve subjected myself to
Life is cruel, and I’m merely one of its foolish victims
I’ve irrevocably damaged the lives of the people who matter to me
No matter what I say or do, I can never make up for it
I’m in a dark and unstable place
I can’t find the light and set myself free
Life isn’t worth living with this pain I’m going through
So why not just end it all with two momentary pains?
And watch my life bleed out of this hollow shell of the person I once was.
Written by LunasChild8
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Anonymous
Related submission no longer exists.
Love Hate Relationship
It's been three months now without you
i go days without thinking about you
But some days i find that i'm losing my mind
And i yearn and i miss and i shout you
For decades we roamed clouds together
And didn't mind where how or whether
Hell or heaven sent i still catch your scent
We were bonded by a smoky tether
No i don't miss you at all yes i do
i thought you were love but we're through
Hear you calling my name but if it's all the same
No i want you i need you i hate you
You helped me forget who i was
But you were my downfall because
i just couldn't cope with being this dope
And so now i am taking this pause
i hid your utensils from my wife
In case you return to my life
And i'm full to the hilt of this awful guilt
You've given me nothing but strife
The worst thing though is this grief
And knowing that i can't get relief
There is no desire that replaces your fire
You've damned me is my belief
There's no way that i can employ ya
And if only i could i would destroy ya
No one has to guess why i am such a mess
And you infected me with paranoia
And even though i won't be the same
i'm telling you to fuck off Mary Jane
But still stay close if i should need your dose
No damn it you're not worth the pain
i go days without thinking about you
But some days i find that i'm losing my mind
And i yearn and i miss and i shout you
For decades we roamed clouds together
And didn't mind where how or whether
Hell or heaven sent i still catch your scent
We were bonded by a smoky tether
No i don't miss you at all yes i do
i thought you were love but we're through
Hear you calling my name but if it's all the same
No i want you i need you i hate you
You helped me forget who i was
But you were my downfall because
i just couldn't cope with being this dope
And so now i am taking this pause
i hid your utensils from my wife
In case you return to my life
And i'm full to the hilt of this awful guilt
You've given me nothing but strife
The worst thing though is this grief
And knowing that i can't get relief
There is no desire that replaces your fire
You've damned me is my belief
There's no way that i can employ ya
And if only i could i would destroy ya
No one has to guess why i am such a mess
And you infected me with paranoia
And even though i won't be the same
i'm telling you to fuck off Mary Jane
But still stay close if i should need your dose
No damn it you're not worth the pain
Written by Northern1
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Anonymous
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Anonymous
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Anonymous
Flip To Page 66
I bought this journal because my therapist told me to
She told me to “write down my feelings to express them,”
So that’s what I’m going to do
I fill the pages with self loathing and self pity
Sometimes I fill the pages with “I hate you,”
Written again and again
I leave the inkings of my heart on the paper
Page 1: I don’t have much to say.
Page 2: It’s just another regular day.
Page 3: Today was a bad day, I can’t keep these thoughts at bay.
Page 4-40: I hate everyone, I hate myself
Hate, hate, hate suffocating the pages. I’m done.
Page 41-50: I can’t stand another day, why must I suffer so much. This pain is a debt that I must pay.
Page 51-60: I have nothing, I am nothing, nothing matters.
Page 61-65: It’s been months and nothings changed. These thoughts are driving me insane.
Page 66: I can’t take this anymore
Every breath I take is agony
Blood splatter is on the ceiling and the floor
So here I stand on the 100th floor balcony
I’ve made a profound self discovery
With irreversible consequences
Once I push myself over the edge there’s no recovery
I’m now self aware, I’ve come to my senses
My therapist would be so proud
The sirens in the distant are wailing so loud
My toes dangle over the edge
As I stare into the flower beds
I’m sorry if this hurts you or seems sudden
But I’ve had these thoughts ever since I can remember
I wish life had a reset button
So cremate me and turn my flesh into embers
I’m sorry if you think I’m weak
But my life is bleak
Writing down my thoughts has opened my eyes
About how my existence is feeble and meek
I can’t keep up this facade
It’s a fools game of charade
So I’ve decided to acquaint
My face with the pavement
Before I meet my end
On the front of this journal,
I etch
“Flip to page 66, for the reason I’m dead.”
She told me to “write down my feelings to express them,”
So that’s what I’m going to do
I fill the pages with self loathing and self pity
Sometimes I fill the pages with “I hate you,”
Written again and again
I leave the inkings of my heart on the paper
Page 1: I don’t have much to say.
Page 2: It’s just another regular day.
Page 3: Today was a bad day, I can’t keep these thoughts at bay.
Page 4-40: I hate everyone, I hate myself
Hate, hate, hate suffocating the pages. I’m done.
Page 41-50: I can’t stand another day, why must I suffer so much. This pain is a debt that I must pay.
Page 51-60: I have nothing, I am nothing, nothing matters.
Page 61-65: It’s been months and nothings changed. These thoughts are driving me insane.
Page 66: I can’t take this anymore
Every breath I take is agony
Blood splatter is on the ceiling and the floor
So here I stand on the 100th floor balcony
I’ve made a profound self discovery
With irreversible consequences
Once I push myself over the edge there’s no recovery
I’m now self aware, I’ve come to my senses
My therapist would be so proud
The sirens in the distant are wailing so loud
My toes dangle over the edge
As I stare into the flower beds
I’m sorry if this hurts you or seems sudden
But I’ve had these thoughts ever since I can remember
I wish life had a reset button
So cremate me and turn my flesh into embers
I’m sorry if you think I’m weak
But my life is bleak
Writing down my thoughts has opened my eyes
About how my existence is feeble and meek
I can’t keep up this facade
It’s a fools game of charade
So I’ve decided to acquaint
My face with the pavement
Before I meet my end
On the front of this journal,
I etch
“Flip to page 66, for the reason I’m dead.”
Written by Heart_symphony
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Decaying Inside
There’s an emptiness inside me
It’s echoing around
I dig, I pry
Trying to find something inside
My insides are like a desolate house
Empty and abandon
All life left years ago
The old lock on the door is broken
So anyone can walk in
People tread all over the floorboards of my heart
Leaving a trail of footsteps
They look at all the empty rooms
Examine the empty walls
Then leave the house and never return
My insides have become foot trodden
The floor boards are creaking
There’s cracks in the walls
The foundations are leaking
My house is decaying
The walls are trembling
Soon my insides will crumble
It’s echoing around
I dig, I pry
Trying to find something inside
My insides are like a desolate house
Empty and abandon
All life left years ago
The old lock on the door is broken
So anyone can walk in
People tread all over the floorboards of my heart
Leaving a trail of footsteps
They look at all the empty rooms
Examine the empty walls
Then leave the house and never return
My insides have become foot trodden
The floor boards are creaking
There’s cracks in the walls
The foundations are leaking
My house is decaying
The walls are trembling
Soon my insides will crumble
Written by Heart_symphony
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Heart Debt
You said you’d never leave me
But that’s what they all say
And in the end they leave
Leave me with heart debt
I have given my entire heart
To my past loves
So now my hearts negative
It a black burn mark in my chest
I overdraw a piece of heart
To give it to my darling
It’s all I have to give
They mindlessly take it
I keep slicing at my loaned heart
Falling deeper
And deeper
Into love debt
In the end my love leaves
But I always find a new love
To overdraw my heart to
So I take another slice
I frantically drain my account
To give more heart
If I don’t my love will leave
But they always leave anyways
I have nothing left
So I beg the bank for more
To give to my new darling
To bask in loves warmth
Borrowed warmth
Given to fickle people
Who slip away
Like a coin in a slot machine
My baby’s eyes gleam
“Win the big prize”
Keep draining your account
The jackpot is just out of reach
But I’ve run out of credit
All my accounts are maxed
My tabs are overflowing
And my loves run dry
My love is all depleted
So my baby has abandon me
Taking with them
The heart and love I loaned
Anxiety spikes
They’re coming to collect
From my bankrupt account
My heart debt
But that’s what they all say
And in the end they leave
Leave me with heart debt
I have given my entire heart
To my past loves
So now my hearts negative
It a black burn mark in my chest
I overdraw a piece of heart
To give it to my darling
It’s all I have to give
They mindlessly take it
I keep slicing at my loaned heart
Falling deeper
And deeper
Into love debt
In the end my love leaves
But I always find a new love
To overdraw my heart to
So I take another slice
I frantically drain my account
To give more heart
If I don’t my love will leave
But they always leave anyways
I have nothing left
So I beg the bank for more
To give to my new darling
To bask in loves warmth
Borrowed warmth
Given to fickle people
Who slip away
Like a coin in a slot machine
My baby’s eyes gleam
“Win the big prize”
Keep draining your account
The jackpot is just out of reach
But I’ve run out of credit
All my accounts are maxed
My tabs are overflowing
And my loves run dry
My love is all depleted
So my baby has abandon me
Taking with them
The heart and love I loaned
Anxiety spikes
They’re coming to collect
From my bankrupt account
My heart debt
Written by Heart_symphony
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Anonymous
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