Non-Fiction Prose Seeking Honest Critique
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Non-poetic writing including diary extracts, journal entries, letters, essays and art
Honest critique has been requested for these poems. Want to learn the art of critique? Join our Honestly Crafted Critique group.
12:49AM Thoughts For You to Know
Time has its way of ticking doesn’t it?
Seeing your face and hearing your voice got me thinking. I wish things were different...
If you can go back would you change how we drifted apart and grew distant?
Do you wish I was a little more persistent?
I know things didn’t go as you envisioned it but the past is now irrelevant. Your days moving forward you have to be on top of shit.
I still believe in you and your capabilities. Creating anew is what you have to do. Believe in yourself as I do. Let more positive words flow from your lips. Don’t...
Seeing your face and hearing your voice got me thinking. I wish things were different...
If you can go back would you change how we drifted apart and grew distant?
Do you wish I was a little more persistent?
I know things didn’t go as you envisioned it but the past is now irrelevant. Your days moving forward you have to be on top of shit.
I still believe in you and your capabilities. Creating anew is what you have to do. Believe in yourself as I do. Let more positive words flow from your lips. Don’t...
#TimeHeals
#uplifting
#support
#admiration
#respect
19 reads
1 Comment
To the weeds
There are not enough days in the entire year to fill up the void you’ve left behind.
I will miss you until the sun swallows the sky, and until the earth is no more and we all return to the weeds.
There weren’t enough moments with you
And I would give my soul away to see you one last time. I will cry for the loss of you until the sky is no more, until we are no more. I will miss you for the rest of my lifetime.
Life is finite, and I wish that I’d been with you more, that I’d clung to you and held on for dear life. Because I am now here,
Searching...
I will miss you until the sun swallows the sky, and until the earth is no more and we all return to the weeds.
There weren’t enough moments with you
And I would give my soul away to see you one last time. I will cry for the loss of you until the sky is no more, until we are no more. I will miss you for the rest of my lifetime.
Life is finite, and I wish that I’d been with you more, that I’d clung to you and held on for dear life. Because I am now here,
Searching...
#grief
#death
#IMissYou
12 reads
3 Comments
Bar and Lanes on Main
He walked into the old bar on Main,
and he sat down at the counter.
The server had gone out to smoke,
it was just a man and his feelings there.
In the same old empty building where-
he once used to drink away his pain.
In the corner was an ancient pool table,
with scratched up felt and worn wood-
where he once played billiards with pals.
He was more aged now, a few years late;
and in his contemplation, a heavy sigh.
The white-shirt server came in the side,
and quickly opened up his eyes.
"Haven't seen you here in ages! My, my." ...
and he sat down at the counter.
The server had gone out to smoke,
it was just a man and his feelings there.
In the same old empty building where-
he once used to drink away his pain.
In the corner was an ancient pool table,
with scratched up felt and worn wood-
where he once played billiards with pals.
He was more aged now, a few years late;
and in his contemplation, a heavy sigh.
The white-shirt server came in the side,
and quickly opened up his eyes.
"Haven't seen you here in ages! My, my." ...
#narrative
#dialogue
14 reads
0 Comments
And the lingering relationship between diva, and before the performance.
And the lingering relationship between diva and before the performance, visual poem
#meditation
17 reads
1 Comment
Chypre
His scent was like the fragrance of bottled adventure, fermented and crafted with time, vintage like whilst his elegance was stately, composed like an orchestrated symphony as I noted subtle signs of his masculinity whilst his prominence announced itself, and I dabbled in the depths of the unspoken but felt whilst inhaling the base notes of his essence, basking in the radiance of his playful aura as he tendered nothing but his raw authenticity & intelligence, and my lips squandered the opportunity as he beckoned me to come closer whilst strategically fingering the pattern etched upon my...
#lover
51 reads
5 Comments
there is no title to an apology
my apologies to the people who have been subjected to my shit. I am not a good interactor. I am insensitive, a terrible writer, and I have shoved my shit in your faces for so long and at such high volume that you have had no choice but to pay attention to me. And I wrote something very insensitive about the war which continues to affect so many lives today (I said I felt like it was my fault, which may have been just too much for a couple of big folks around here).
I have never been to war, and I can only comprehend it's horrors in my mind. Same thing with life on the death...
I have never been to war, and I can only comprehend it's horrors in my mind. Same thing with life on the death...
#myself
37 reads
6 Comments
its love
when they are real
themselves
with no audience or
parlor tricks
or charades
just two people
being real
directly speaking
not misleading
that's what creates trust....
themselves
with no audience or
parlor tricks
or charades
just two people
being real
directly speaking
not misleading
that's what creates trust....
#TruthOfLife
53 reads
12 Comments
Anomalies of the heart...

#love
53 reads
4 Comments
Jonny Gigolo
Star-date 1984
Midnight out on the dance floor
A flash from my past
I could see her over there looking apprehensive
Like she wasn’t interested in squeezing my ass
But holus-bolus she was pump’n her brakes
While her foot rested heavily on the gas
Just waiting for the race to begin
The very moment I dropped my pants
But I wasted no time with the proverbial
“Hello beautiful, my name is Jonny”
My sword just inching its way out of its sheath
With lustful eyes for her autonomy
But we only...
Midnight out on the dance floor
A flash from my past
I could see her over there looking apprehensive
Like she wasn’t interested in squeezing my ass
But holus-bolus she was pump’n her brakes
While her foot rested heavily on the gas
Just waiting for the race to begin
The very moment I dropped my pants
But I wasted no time with the proverbial
“Hello beautiful, my name is Jonny”
My sword just inching its way out of its sheath
With lustful eyes for her autonomy
But we only...
#love
#lust
#marriage
#sex
#memories
45 reads
5 Comments
Walking Kamikazes
Walking kamikazes
Violent Zombies
Ticking time bombs with over exerted consciousness
Underrepresented in the grand scheme
Some people get frustrated and take their personal pain out on others or themselves
Lock their feelings away
Then display the “Brave face,” as it’s called.
Our biological Battery life drains with each waking moment, but when the charge is focused within, what is the ratio between positive and negative?
I wanna address my folks for a second, cause Black people really don’t mess with mental health at all.
We have an...
Violent Zombies
Ticking time bombs with over exerted consciousness
Underrepresented in the grand scheme
Some people get frustrated and take their personal pain out on others or themselves
Lock their feelings away
Then display the “Brave face,” as it’s called.
Our biological Battery life drains with each waking moment, but when the charge is focused within, what is the ratio between positive and negative?
I wanna address my folks for a second, cause Black people really don’t mess with mental health at all.
We have an...
#LifeStruggles
#SelfWorth
63 reads
4 Comments
what do you want me to say?
it .makes. the. voices.
....stop
....stop
#ILoveYou
#fate
#TruthOfLife #magic
#TruthOfLife #magic
53 reads
3 Comments
Solving the Monty Hall puzzler (Pt. 1)
The Monty Hall puzzle, was a
big matter of discussion,
way back in the 1970's,
even PjDs in mathematics made staunch,
but incorrect solutions about it.
The problem was finally proved by
programming a computer
(thank heavens for computers)
to simulate the game.
Finally the community at large
decided that the
Monty Hall puzzler
had been solved.
On Monty Hall's game show,
there are three doors.
Behind two doors are goats,
which nobody in the world could love.
(except a few animal lovers, but...
big matter of discussion,
way back in the 1970's,
even PjDs in mathematics made staunch,
but incorrect solutions about it.
The problem was finally proved by
programming a computer
(thank heavens for computers)
to simulate the game.
Finally the community at large
decided that the
Monty Hall puzzler
had been solved.
On Monty Hall's game show,
there are three doors.
Behind two doors are goats,
which nobody in the world could love.
(except a few animal lovers, but...
#earth
#fire
#water
14 reads
0 Comments
DU Poetry : Non-Fiction Prose Seeking Critique: Short Stories, Diary Entries and Letters