Non-Fiction Prose Seeking Honest Critique
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Non-poetic writing including diary extracts, journal entries, letters, essays and art
Honest critique has been requested for these poems. Want to learn the art of critique? Join our Honestly Crafted Critique group.
Nizana
Lauryn
Lauryn
Poem Published
Today 1:44pm
Today 1:44pm
Diary entry - Smoking
Diary entry for Dec. 9, 2023
I can feel my baby growing inside me. She’s a constant reminder of the incredible journey I'm on. Joseph and I spent a quiet evening together, just enjoying each other's company. The love we share is so profound, and I find myself grateful for it every day.
I stopped smoking for the sake of my baby, and I know it was the right thing to do. Still, there are moments, especially after making love to Joseph, where I long for the comfort of a single cigarette. It's like a ghost from my past, whispering in my ear, tempting me to indulge just this once....
I can feel my baby growing inside me. She’s a constant reminder of the incredible journey I'm on. Joseph and I spent a quiet evening together, just enjoying each other's company. The love we share is so profound, and I find myself grateful for it every day.
I stopped smoking for the sake of my baby, and I know it was the right thing to do. Still, there are moments, especially after making love to Joseph, where I long for the comfort of a single cigarette. It's like a ghost from my past, whispering in my ear, tempting me to indulge just this once....
#love
#drugs
#tobacco
#addiction
#pregnancy
27 reads
1 Comment
monovox128
Poem Published
Yesterday 6:24pm
Yesterday 6:24pm
NEED A CUDDLE
Need a cuddle, perhaps you're are available?
Promise I will not dally and linger too long
Perhaps seven or possibly eight hours
Quite possibly maybe till the break of dawn.
Give me enough time to satisfy this craving
That lingers with me all day and
all night
I am soon gonna wind up in the loony bin
If I can not get a taste of your sweet delights.
Need a cuddle, perhaps you are available?
To take me to heaven and we'll knock on the door
I promise I will not ever overstay my welcome
It'll only be until eternity,...
Promise I will not dally and linger too long
Perhaps seven or possibly eight hours
Quite possibly maybe till the break of dawn.
Give me enough time to satisfy this craving
That lingers with me all day and
all night
I am soon gonna wind up in the loony bin
If I can not get a taste of your sweet delights.
Need a cuddle, perhaps you are available?
To take me to heaven and we'll knock on the door
I promise I will not ever overstay my welcome
It'll only be until eternity,...
#happiness
#love
#gratitude #admiration
#gratitude #admiration
56 reads
4 Comments
Anna41_
Poem Published
Yesterday 3:01pm
Yesterday 3:01pm
Mad Cow...Mad Momma
Im on a milk cow mission...
The first time I milked my cow I got 2 1/2 gallon of milk.
Then day by day, milking after milking, the amount dwindled.
My cow has not been on grain in the 6 months that Ive had her prior to dropping her calf and me starting my milking routine.
We paid 1600 dollars for that heifer, she gonna milk! 😂
By the time I stopped milking her, approximately three to four weeks ago, I was only getting a pint of milk twice a day.
So, all the work just wasn't worth it just to get one drink.
I turned her back out to pasture with...
The first time I milked my cow I got 2 1/2 gallon of milk.
Then day by day, milking after milking, the amount dwindled.
My cow has not been on grain in the 6 months that Ive had her prior to dropping her calf and me starting my milking routine.
We paid 1600 dollars for that heifer, she gonna milk! 😂
By the time I stopped milking her, approximately three to four weeks ago, I was only getting a pint of milk twice a day.
So, all the work just wasn't worth it just to get one drink.
I turned her back out to pasture with...
#responsibility
29 reads
4 Comments
Nizana
Lauryn
Lauryn
Poem Published
Yesterday 3:00pm
Yesterday 3:00pm
Journal Entry - If I Were
Dec. 7
As my head rested on his chest, I looked down across the span of Joseph’s body, so lean and firm. While listening to his breathing, I thought to myself...
If I were a painter, I’d paint him, dipping my brush in the hues of the emotions that swirled around us, creating a canvas that mirrored the depths of our love. Every stroke would be a testament to the beauty he shared with me.
If I were a sculptor, I'd sculpt him, molding him from the finest clay, shaping each contour to capture the essence of his being. The cool touch of the purest clay would echo...
As my head rested on his chest, I looked down across the span of Joseph’s body, so lean and firm. While listening to his breathing, I thought to myself...
If I were a painter, I’d paint him, dipping my brush in the hues of the emotions that swirled around us, creating a canvas that mirrored the depths of our love. Every stroke would be a testament to the beauty he shared with me.
If I were a sculptor, I'd sculpt him, molding him from the finest clay, shaping each contour to capture the essence of his being. The cool touch of the purest clay would echo...
#love
#sex
45 reads
3 Comments
Anna41_
Poem Published
Yesterday 2:31pm
Yesterday 2:31pm
Banner
I could say so much, but I choose not to.
Silence is beautiful, working it out in the wing.
I want to believe there is light left in this world, and so I shall...
If it's your will Lord, and only your will, I will fight empty handed with nothing but a full heart if need be.
Your Grace abounds, you mercy uplifting.
I'm a broken mess, I've been a whore, I've been a liar and I'm still lying, but it's not a lie to hurt anyone, only I can be hurt by this lie. So please, turn my lie into joy, appreciation in place of resentment, and extend your strength to me until...
Silence is beautiful, working it out in the wing.
I want to believe there is light left in this world, and so I shall...
If it's your will Lord, and only your will, I will fight empty handed with nothing but a full heart if need be.
Your Grace abounds, you mercy uplifting.
I'm a broken mess, I've been a whore, I've been a liar and I'm still lying, but it's not a lie to hurt anyone, only I can be hurt by this lie. So please, turn my lie into joy, appreciation in place of resentment, and extend your strength to me until...
#love
#kindness
#strength
#gratitude
#redemption
39 reads
4 Comments
Anna41_
Poem Published
7th Dec 2023 4:15pm
7th Dec 2023 4:15pm
Best Pie Crust Ever
One five pound bag of all purpose flour
• One 5 pound tub of Crisco
• One cup of Kayro syrup
• Three cups of cold water
• Salt
In a large bowl combine entire bag of flour, entire tub of Crisco, knead together, adding one cup of Kayro syrup, then add three cups of cold water, add salt to taste while kneading. Work with hands until a playdough consistency forms.
Dump on table and form dough into a circle, cut into fourths.
Take each section, roll into a log and cut into five pieces, roll each piece into a ball, place...
• One 5 pound tub of Crisco
• One cup of Kayro syrup
• Three cups of cold water
• Salt
In a large bowl combine entire bag of flour, entire tub of Crisco, knead together, adding one cup of Kayro syrup, then add three cups of cold water, add salt to taste while kneading. Work with hands until a playdough consistency forms.
Dump on table and form dough into a circle, cut into fourths.
Take each section, roll into a log and cut into five pieces, roll each piece into a ball, place...
#love
60 reads
5 Comments
Anna41_
Poem Published
7th Dec 2023 12:26pm
7th Dec 2023 12:26pm
It Just Comes Naturally
Grown men, and not to sound condescending, but I smile while watching them tromps across the grocery store parking lot, arms swinging, pants drooping, like little boys all grown up.
From three to eighty.
I love it!
They pull their saggy bottoms up, adjust their stride, and if their wives are present she looks them over, like a mothering hen.
And the women?
Do women always act like they have it all together?
Or are we expected to always have it all together?
I love taking care of the men in my life.
I'd miss it greatly if the opportunity was...
From three to eighty.
I love it!
They pull their saggy bottoms up, adjust their stride, and if their wives are present she looks them over, like a mothering hen.
And the women?
Do women always act like they have it all together?
Or are we expected to always have it all together?
I love taking care of the men in my life.
I'd miss it greatly if the opportunity was...
#happiness
#love
#respect #emotions
#respect #emotions
42 reads
6 Comments
monovox128
Poem Published
5th Dec 2023 11:43pm
5th Dec 2023 11:43pm
THE FACETS of LOVE
THE FACETS of LOVE
Walk in the wilderness of winter
Across the wasteland of despair
Reach the sunshine shore afar
Washed by the warm azure sea
Discover the alluring niche.
Yearning my time to enter
I have waited so long
That’s where I sense love
Unveil from shroud of obscurity
I follow the tantalizing silver track.
A mesmeric moon takes upon satin skies
Until the dreamy dawn rises
From the sunburst hued horizon
Tinges the opalescent dew drops
Shining in the meadow of mind.
...
Walk in the wilderness of winter
Across the wasteland of despair
Reach the sunshine shore afar
Washed by the warm azure sea
Discover the alluring niche.
Yearning my time to enter
I have waited so long
That’s where I sense love
Unveil from shroud of obscurity
I follow the tantalizing silver track.
A mesmeric moon takes upon satin skies
Until the dreamy dawn rises
From the sunburst hued horizon
Tinges the opalescent dew drops
Shining in the meadow of mind.
...
#love
#strength
#hope
#gratitude
#admiration
57 reads
0 Comments
Anna41_
Poem Published
5th Dec 2023 2:32pm
5th Dec 2023 2:32pm
Ants On Rembrandt
Do you know how much God loves us?
I mean think about it, he was the life giver to Picasso.
So, how much bigger the Master creator over his creations?
He laid us on his Rembrandt and trusted us to choose the right tool.
So grabbing a weapon in place of a paintbrush makes no sense.
What did he create that threatens you so?
The moon?
The stars?
The soft falling snow in the winter?
That fat sassy Blue Jay against pure white flakes?
The green in the grass?
No? What then, I implore you!
You think the red in their veins, spilling on this...
I mean think about it, he was the life giver to Picasso.
So, how much bigger the Master creator over his creations?
He laid us on his Rembrandt and trusted us to choose the right tool.
So grabbing a weapon in place of a paintbrush makes no sense.
What did he create that threatens you so?
The moon?
The stars?
The soft falling snow in the winter?
That fat sassy Blue Jay against pure white flakes?
The green in the grass?
No? What then, I implore you!
You think the red in their veins, spilling on this...
#love
#kindness
#strength
#hope
#emotions
51 reads
0 Comments
Anna41_
Poem Published
4th Dec 2023 2:02pm
4th Dec 2023 2:02pm
Mice Like Giants
I remember meeting you.
I was sitting in the cold mud underneath my momma's porch, I remember that was the first time, at the tender age of 8 that I wanted to die.
Then here you came, you scurried along the copper water line, my mind jumping track from death to life, while I frantically grabbed my miniature fish net.
I scooped you up and held you tight in my dirty little hands.
I remember your big black eyes and soft fur with white on your chest.
Your big eyes seemed to still my scared pounding heart.
All of my confusing emotions of that day.
The day...
I was sitting in the cold mud underneath my momma's porch, I remember that was the first time, at the tender age of 8 that I wanted to die.
Then here you came, you scurried along the copper water line, my mind jumping track from death to life, while I frantically grabbed my miniature fish net.
I scooped you up and held you tight in my dirty little hands.
I remember your big black eyes and soft fur with white on your chest.
Your big eyes seemed to still my scared pounding heart.
All of my confusing emotions of that day.
The day...
#love
#strength
#gratitude #emotions
#gratitude #emotions
44 reads
2 Comments
monovox128
Poem Published
4th Dec 2023 1:47pm
4th Dec 2023 1:47pm
SPILL YOUR INK
Spill your ink on blank page. Express your rage.
Suppression only leads to mental pain.
Without catharsis, art is trapped in cage.
Trauma will stain, as you age.
Gain your stage.
Sage soul smiles.
It's worthwhile to tame your flame. Poetry is perfect for thoughts to drain.
Sane words flow to show feelings have no shame.
Mute charcoal clouds, hail chord sounds.
Tear drop rain.
Brain feels free.
Peace now reigns.
Clear skies bring glee.
Release of burdens cleanse untouched debris.
Suppression only leads to mental pain.
Without catharsis, art is trapped in cage.
Trauma will stain, as you age.
Gain your stage.
Sage soul smiles.
It's worthwhile to tame your flame. Poetry is perfect for thoughts to drain.
Sane words flow to show feelings have no shame.
Mute charcoal clouds, hail chord sounds.
Tear drop rain.
Brain feels free.
Peace now reigns.
Clear skies bring glee.
Release of burdens cleanse untouched debris.
#strength
#courage
#motivational
#inspirational
#bittersweet
52 reads
2 Comments
Anna41_
Poem Published
4th Dec 2023 1:16pm
4th Dec 2023 1:16pm
Mighty Mouse
There is an enemy lurking.
She stalks me with quiet paws.
I stand still, focusing on my shallow breathing...
Tears streaming from my soul.
Her growl at my feet, sweat pouring down my neck.
She has had it with me, I keep my head down, my heart beat quiet.
My song bird caged.
My dancing shoes retired.
My laughter reserved.
The child in me lulled to sleep.
I hear them lying to me, I go to speak in objection but her teeth warn me from my own voice.
As I hold the mouse safely in my hand.
You should know, if the mouse goes...I...
She stalks me with quiet paws.
I stand still, focusing on my shallow breathing...
Tears streaming from my soul.
Her growl at my feet, sweat pouring down my neck.
She has had it with me, I keep my head down, my heart beat quiet.
My song bird caged.
My dancing shoes retired.
My laughter reserved.
The child in me lulled to sleep.
I hear them lying to me, I go to speak in objection but her teeth warn me from my own voice.
As I hold the mouse safely in my hand.
You should know, if the mouse goes...I...
#love
#kindness
#strength
#hope
#courage
39 reads
0 Comments
DU Poetry : Non-Fiction Prose Seeking Critique: Short Stories, Diary Entries and Letters
