Sincerely Aware of my LOVE 4 YOU.

The crackling fire spits sparks into the night sky
The atmosphere, alive,  with bright hues of burnt sienna
Illuminating your spirit with pure beauty,  sadness cannot thrive.
Love more real than any I have known..

Your eyes are so blue, not even a hint of a storm cloud approaching.
Your smile makes me forget every other lover I've known.
Every part of my body throbs in anticipation of your touch...............

I never saw it coming, blinded by emotions and lies
Leaving welts you left on my soul, so damaged
Your bitterness eats me alive
Buried alive,, slowly suffocating by the dirt thrown into my mouth.

Beating me into the ground with a shovel..  
I can hear the echoes within the soil, tormenting with anguish
Violently trembling and  shuddering with anger.. or is it  fear?
Sorrow aches deep within , vulnerable.

A vicious cycle starts from sweet to sadistic...
Wicked thoughts invade the purity of love.
Will we be able to withstand the cruelty and pain?

Unable to reach some kind of compromise.
How much I love and adore you,
My soul is old and my spirit free,
Yet you try to clip my wings and cage my essence.

Forever filtering  through my flaws and imperfections
Your intoxication transforming you into a savage
Being tortured, slowly, and with a motive
Your words are  weapons to use against me.

Flesh ripped apart,   blurring my vision with such a vengeance
Scratching and clawing
As they furiously circle and isolate their victim.

I am no innocent, I will not be
Oblivious to my crazed, moody outbursts.
I forget that my tongue can be the fork that eats you alive.
My mind unable to comprehend the damage I've done.
All my demands are incinerating the chance of happiness.

My addiction and your affliction segregate our hope
Calculative and manipulating, we can't live like this  
We both lose a battle we don't even realize is going on within ourselves.
Making no sense of the battles we choose, petty and useless.

What is the true reality of our abuse?   You are forever placing blame...
Surely, this cannot be love, for it takes no prisoners
Forever damaged and scarred, bitterness within my heart...

Wandering aimlessly, surrendering to my demise
But still, my heart belongs to only you
Knowing that only pain will it cause

Tired of running in circles,
Aren't you tired of sleeping in your clothes?
Never trusting again without fear of anger and loss?
Or does it matter to you what the peace and love will have conquered or will you only think of what it has cost?
This poem was written as non-fiction.  A