deepundergroundpoetry.com
Clothing Optional
*just my light and fluffy thought for the day, hence the rhyming, which I know you so abhor*
As I peruse the pages here
I'm oft times overwhelmed
by over-use of metaphors
and words that are mis-spelled
But perhaps what troubles most of all
Is when a poem I've just read
Leaves me sitting here bewildered
for I've no clue what you've just said
Your words are so mellifluous
And there are ninetyseven lines
describing things most banal
yet no meaning can I find
I scratch my head, quite puzzled
for I don't believe I'm dense
but this richly veiled gibberish?
well, to me it makes no sense
I scan reviews before me
and the words sing glowing praise
seems THEY have found the meaning
in the issues that you raised
I want so much to join them
in lauding your latest prose
but truthfully, I'm reminded of
The Emperor's New Clothes
As I peruse the pages here
I'm oft times overwhelmed
by over-use of metaphors
and words that are mis-spelled
But perhaps what troubles most of all
Is when a poem I've just read
Leaves me sitting here bewildered
for I've no clue what you've just said
Your words are so mellifluous
And there are ninetyseven lines
describing things most banal
yet no meaning can I find
I scratch my head, quite puzzled
for I don't believe I'm dense
but this richly veiled gibberish?
well, to me it makes no sense
I scan reviews before me
and the words sing glowing praise
seems THEY have found the meaning
in the issues that you raised
I want so much to join them
in lauding your latest prose
but truthfully, I'm reminded of
The Emperor's New Clothes
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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comments 21
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Re: Clothing Optional
23rd Feb 2013 3:30pm
Haha, I guess somebody had to say it. Not bad at all Low-lah, considering the much abhored ryhme.
Quirky little number, good job
Quirky little number, good job
1
re: Re: Clothing Optional
23rd Feb 2013 3:35pm
ha ha! It was actually written for another site, but I thought I would share it anyway. Sometimes I just can't resist a little poke and prod. ;)
All in the name of fun!
Low-Lah
All in the name of fun!
Low-Lah
Re: Clothing Optional
23rd Feb 2013 4:12pm
A great witty pen Lola, I cannot wrap my head around some things, but I do enjoy a well written cryptic poem and trying to solve the puzzle so to speak.
The picture is fab, made me ~smile~
The picture is fab, made me ~smile~
1
Re: Clothing Optional
23rd Feb 2013 4:27pm
Glad you enjoyed. I enjoy the cryptic as well. I think we can just all relate to the feeling somedays though, of feeling obtuse because we're just not "getting it". Sometimes it's us as the flawed reader, but there are times when there is just nothing to "get".
There is never shame in not understanding, just in pretending that one does.
There is never shame in not understanding, just in pretending that one does.
Re: Clothing Optional
23rd Feb 2013 4:32pm
re: Re: Clothing Optional
23rd Feb 2013 8:20pm
Re: Clothing Optional
23rd Feb 2013 6:21pm
Hossanna to a poet who can speak the truth with wit- but of course as one who adores rather than abhors rhyme I am somewhat biased - only one small complaint - I don't know where yo got that picture of me- but you might hsave asked pbp - that said - it was very kind of you to add all those pixels when in sad truth not quite so many were actually needed.
LeMuseNoir
LeMuseNoir
1
re: Re: Clothing Optional
23rd Feb 2013 8:17pm
Re: Clothing Optional
23rd Feb 2013 7:19pm
You have just inspired me to rhyme on The Emperor's New Clothes.
It was to be his greatest day,
People flocked the street in droves,
But it took one brave honest man
To say: "HE'S GOT NO CLOTHES!"
It was to be his greatest day,
People flocked the street in droves,
But it took one brave honest man
To say: "HE'S GOT NO CLOTHES!"
1
Re: Clothing Optional
Anonymous
23rd Feb 2013 8:45pm
Nice true write Lola...Strider
1
Re: Clothing Optional
LMAO! Hilarious and truthful content!
I won't lie....Ive gave some overly embellished reviews to make other poets smile, but Ive since stopped. No need to give false hope! ...Besides, it gets quite difficult to come up with untruths all day.......I'm not good at lying and this site leaves me with an headache on the days I do fib...lol...
That last line, sealed with the pic was killer.
Love it! :))))
I won't lie....Ive gave some overly embellished reviews to make other poets smile, but Ive since stopped. No need to give false hope! ...Besides, it gets quite difficult to come up with untruths all day.......I'm not good at lying and this site leaves me with an headache on the days I do fib...lol...
That last line, sealed with the pic was killer.
Love it! :))))
1
re: Re: Clothing Optional
23rd Feb 2013 11:41pm
Thanks Rain. I think I hunted high and low for hours to find just the right version of that picture. Glad you enjoyed the write. It was a fun one to write.
Lola
Lola
Re: Clothing Optional
23rd Feb 2013 11:48pm
Okay this is brain food. I traditionally react to poetry I don't understand one of two ways; either I wrack my brain trying to figure out what is wrong with me or I direct it the other way and wonder what did the person writing fail to get across? Then when I show folly in trying to determine if it is based on fantasy or reality, it all becomes a muddy mess!
Nice thought provoker here.
Nice thought provoker here.
1
Re: Clothing Optional
Anonymous
24th Feb 2013 1:36am
Haha xD
Lola, you have quite the epic personality.
Lola, you have quite the epic personality.
1
re: Re: Clothing Optional
24th Feb 2013 1:41am
Well, there is no arguing that! Not with a straight face, at any rate. I try not to take anything too seriously, especially myself. thanks for dropping in Queen!
Re: Clothing Optional
1st Mar 2013 9:49pm
Hey Lola...some song that was. No the Lola one not your gritty ditty.
Like you, I hate kiss arse reviews when they are just in some sort of Cliche to keep up the hit rate. However this is a place for troubled minds and souls to have an outlet; rather like kintergarten where a new set of rules have to be learnt for the child to flourish. So positive reinforcement is often beneficial to those stumbling to even write something through their pain and suffering.
Welcome to a site for all rather than some quasi meritocracy run by speudo intelectuals for their own agrandisement. Its the big picture wot counts and here, pobody's nerfect.
[this dyslexic left his speel check off just for you]
Terry
Like you, I hate kiss arse reviews when they are just in some sort of Cliche to keep up the hit rate. However this is a place for troubled minds and souls to have an outlet; rather like kintergarten where a new set of rules have to be learnt for the child to flourish. So positive reinforcement is often beneficial to those stumbling to even write something through their pain and suffering.
Welcome to a site for all rather than some quasi meritocracy run by speudo intelectuals for their own agrandisement. Its the big picture wot counts and here, pobody's nerfect.
[this dyslexic left his speel check off just for you]
Terry
1
re: Re: Clothing Optional
1st Mar 2013 10:01pm
Oh, Terry, I heartily concur that positive reinforcement is a good thing. I am a dog trainer, and know well the value of reward vs punishment. I'll not argue that.
My point was simply that one is best to say nothing if they don't understand, or better yet, to seek an understanding rather than just merely mirroring the thoughts of the previous commenters.
I would never advocate ripping someones work to shreds, nor would I do it. Too many use writing as a form of purging of the soul, and their work is too personal, too close to their hearts. To do so would be cruel.
Lola
My point was simply that one is best to say nothing if they don't understand, or better yet, to seek an understanding rather than just merely mirroring the thoughts of the previous commenters.
I would never advocate ripping someones work to shreds, nor would I do it. Too many use writing as a form of purging of the soul, and their work is too personal, too close to their hearts. To do so would be cruel.
Lola
re: re: Re: Clothing Optional
1st Mar 2013 11:14pm
I like the way you write and was just adding another reflection.
We don't suddenly grow up, and, all things have to be practised. So even if a critique is meaningless to you or I then maybe it is the first step on a long journey for someone else and certainly better than sitting on the sidelines.
Isn't that the reason that sites like 'twitter' become so popular...because people want to feel part of something and to demonstrate that they have a voice.
Please keep to your honesty...it is always welcomed.
We don't suddenly grow up, and, all things have to be practised. So even if a critique is meaningless to you or I then maybe it is the first step on a long journey for someone else and certainly better than sitting on the sidelines.
Isn't that the reason that sites like 'twitter' become so popular...because people want to feel part of something and to demonstrate that they have a voice.
Please keep to your honesty...it is always welcomed.
1
re: re: re: Re: Clothing Optional
2nd Mar 2013 1:21am