deepundergroundpoetry.com
Hiding in the closet
I cannot see
through this door,
through this fear,
through this door I fear
will open.
Land mines go off,
go off underfoot,
shattering hidden hope,
shattering hope of staying hid.
Asymmetrical recriminations.
I was blamed.
I blamed myself,
for cowardice and tears.
The boy haunts the man,
the man conceals his knife,
life favored neither,
now neither favors life.
through this door,
through this fear,
through this door I fear
will open.
Land mines go off,
go off underfoot,
shattering hidden hope,
shattering hope of staying hid.
Asymmetrical recriminations.
I was blamed.
I blamed myself,
for cowardice and tears.
The boy haunts the man,
the man conceals his knife,
life favored neither,
now neither favors life.
Published 13th Feb 2013
| Edited 2nd May 2020
Author's Note
An older poem dusted off and reworked
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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The author encourages honest critique.
13th Feb 2013 5:18am
13th Feb 2013 6:40am
Anonymous
13th Feb 2013 8:25am
This one's so cool....left me wondering.....
Seemingly simple, yet profound.....
Last verse had me sitting too long....so help out a struggling mind here, would you?
Is it the fear that the boy suffered, as a child, which now haunts him in later life?
And, the man seeks answers yet flinches from that doorway which may either hold answers for him or.....pain he wishes to forget...of stuff he wants to be exonerated of, ......maybe?
Dunno, just rambling again, I daresay.
Pen on, poet!
Much enjoyed the read, so thanks for sharing :-)
Cheers
Tidespotter
Seemingly simple, yet profound.....
Last verse had me sitting too long....so help out a struggling mind here, would you?
Is it the fear that the boy suffered, as a child, which now haunts him in later life?
And, the man seeks answers yet flinches from that doorway which may either hold answers for him or.....pain he wishes to forget...of stuff he wants to be exonerated of, ......maybe?
Dunno, just rambling again, I daresay.
Pen on, poet!
Much enjoyed the read, so thanks for sharing :-)
Cheers
Tidespotter
17th Feb 2013 10:53pm
Thanks for the read Tidespotter!
It's more the image of the frightened boy (and the man's pain over his own youthful weakness) that haunts him. Rather than stand up, the boy flinched. And the man flinches upon seeing that image when he closes his eyes.
Later in life, the man's antipathy towards his past keeps him from inhabiting his life. He stands outside it, ghostlike, haunting it.
It's more the image of the frightened boy (and the man's pain over his own youthful weakness) that haunts him. Rather than stand up, the boy flinched. And the man flinches upon seeing that image when he closes his eyes.
Later in life, the man's antipathy towards his past keeps him from inhabiting his life. He stands outside it, ghostlike, haunting it.
14th Feb 2013 4:18am
Tidespotter50 . Just saw this. Thanks. Sleep has drugged me, but I will do my best to respond in tomorrow.
Anonymous
- Edited 17th Feb 2013 11:22pm
17th Feb 2013 11:21pm
But you just did!
And what a cool response, too.
Thanks for taking the time to explain that to me ;-)
Enlightening, to say the least...helped me see it in the intended light.
It's a real pleasure to read you....poem AND comments!
Peace and ink (for poetry more...)
Tidespotter
And what a cool response, too.
Thanks for taking the time to explain that to me ;-)
Enlightening, to say the least...helped me see it in the intended light.
It's a real pleasure to read you....poem AND comments!
Peace and ink (for poetry more...)
Tidespotter
18th Apr 2015 2:11am
