I Wonder

I wonder if you
Ever think about
Me. I wonder if
You remember what
You said we would be.
I wonder if you ever
Look back and remember
Every touch, every kiss,
And every word
As if it was whispered,
Only yesterday.
I wonder if it hurts
You. I wonder if,
When you see me,
You cannot breath
And you hate yourself
For still loving me.
I wonder if you've
Ever wondered if
I wonder about
These sorts of things.
I do.
You probably haven't
Even looked back on
These memories for
A moment. You moved
On and I never
Did because I couldn't.
I couldn't stop
Myself from wishing
You wondered about
Me, or wondering
if you wondered
If I still felt the same
Way. I do and I know
That you don't.
I know that we could
Never go back and be
The way we were ever
Again. I know,
But I still wonder
Because I cannot bare
To face the truth
That's standing right
In front of me and
Telling me I should
Go. I just can't.
My heart forces me
To be in this place
Even though I hate
It here. I cannot walk
Away. I'm not strong
Enough and I doubt
That I will ever
Be. Though I bleed
And bleed, I know
you do not
Love me and I can't
Keep myself from
Wondering because
Reality is too hard
For me. It's
Pathetic, really.
And, I'm sorry that
I'm never going to be
Good enough for you,
Or strong enough to
Leave you.