I wonder what happened to you

   I wonder what happened to you,
  That made you build up all those walls.  

    I wonder what happened to you,
    To fuck up your mind beyond recall.
 
    You can't have been born with it,
    It's something you learnt.
 
    I wonder if the church did it,
    With all its conditions and terms.
 
    And you can sometimes deal with it,
    At least to the outward eye.

    But when shit hits the fan and hits it hard,
    You crumple and run and hide.
 
    Built out of your own insecurities,
    It makes me feel like shit.
   
    And I know you're probably feeling worse,
    But its still hard to chew through all the grit.
 
    And you won't tell me,
    About the past or the present.
    So I cannot understand,
    Why you are being this persistent.
 
    And it hurts to lose,
    A person you thought you loved.
   And even more to lose a friend.
 
    So I find myself sitting here,
   Asking myself once again,
 
    Why are you so fucked?
    Why are you so fucked?

    So ridiculously fucked in the head?