Math- yep, it's a fetish.

Something erotic about math
To few may see
Dividing in half
And carrying a three

Spending days and months
On one equation alone
Even when work becomes stumped
It carries its own

Calculating Hawking Radiation
How bright are the black holes?
Presented with intimidation
And averaging the tolls

Stefan-Boltzmann formula
To find the luminosity
Set in arrhythmia
To solve the monstrosity

Chill sets in
Writing the last of the numbers
Sensation across the skin
To solve it in slumber

They aren't black
After Hawking they shine
And I'm taken aback
At what I could find

After every click
And mechanism works
It all starts to stick
And you're brought back to earth

When you reach that brink
Solving anything with math
The numbers start to sink
And you're on a completely different half

Lost in space and time
Calculating
What goes beyond the mind
Only to find you're demonstrating

Eventually so deep in thought
Brain dead to the outside world
Forgetting what you've been taught
Relative matter becoming unfurled

A release on a much higher level
Than what your body can feel
Stepping over the devil
Just to solve Einstein's field

Breath taking
That last click
Weeks spent contemplating
All leading up to this

When your head bursts
And you forget to speak
When your brain hurts
After not sleeping for weeks

When, just that last final click
When it becomes complete
Everything starts to shift
And that, is the ultimate release