deepundergroundpoetry.com
are you ready
i want to be
within you
in your
retched
damnable
soul
i want to feel
your pain
and stick nine
inch nails
down your
throat
i want you to bleed
i want you to breathe
my name
in jagged inhales
and sharp releases
im ready for you
im ready to engulf your
entire being
turn your beautiful body
into a corpse
are you ready
for
SATAN
within you
in your
retched
damnable
soul
i want to feel
your pain
and stick nine
inch nails
down your
throat
i want you to bleed
i want you to breathe
my name
in jagged inhales
and sharp releases
im ready for you
im ready to engulf your
entire being
turn your beautiful body
into a corpse
are you ready
for
SATAN
Published 15th Dec 2012
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 1
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comments 3
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Anonymous
15th Dec 2012 1:24pm
...mwahaha...
that. was epic. :D
love it.
making SATAN bold instead of capitals would make the poem neater looking.
but same difference.
:)
awesome poem.
that. was epic. :D
love it.
making SATAN bold instead of capitals would make the poem neater looking.
but same difference.
:)
awesome poem.
15th Dec 2012 7:32pm
25th Dec 2012 8:14pm
I really like this one.
Some critique, take it or leave it :)
The placement of some lines threw me a little off.
I would place it as,
"retched damnable soul"
"and stick
Nine inch nails"
Just two minor tweaks, overall I thought the malice and vengeful nature was enjoyable.
Some critique, take it or leave it :)
The placement of some lines threw me a little off.
I would place it as,
"retched damnable soul"
"and stick
Nine inch nails"
Just two minor tweaks, overall I thought the malice and vengeful nature was enjoyable.
