Rosa

Simply beautiful!

Wonderful words put together so very well.

Thank you xoxo

An infinite mirrored regression of all of the women who represent the fantasies of temporary lovers.....all the way back in time.  How many women have satisfied and yet go unnamed? Here one woman stands for them all. Poignant, JG.

Thank you xoxoxo

Looks up at runningturtle...

What he said right there.

Wonderful to read this was.

Mwahs xoxo

G,

i will start with this one. Rosa, if i am
not wrong is 'Rose' in italian? not sure.
i always loved that one, more than rose.
'surfer rosa' happens to be one of my
favourite albums. so figures.

i hope you don't mind taking your poem apart.


"Rosa armed with her sharp prickles  
         and candied petals  
Alluring as she sways with the rhythm of the wind  
Her sweet scent intoxicating  
         Blushing with color  

[after an eon,  saw the usage of ‘prickle’. usually i see the use of the short variant sans the ‘le’.immensely loved the mating of ‘blush’ with ‘colour’.]


Even as she prunes savor her delicate frame  
         Adore her fallen petals  
               Keep her safe  
Lay her naked on your bed striped away from her prickles to bring back that something you've lost  
 
[effortless bravado.:]i believe ‘striped’ should ‘stripped’. L4 is hauntingly beautiful. it tugs and turns. well done.]

           Hold her in your hands  
As you settle into your journey to the unknown  
           She will be your background of beauty  
           Never to wither and die in the minds of those who love you  
                 Rosa
           She has always been more then just a rose

[wow. effortless and beautiful. love the philosophical undertone here. almost
chaste and yet profound.

‘background of beauty’ is superlative. very well done.

the last line sums it all up. lack of punctuation works well, keep it minimal and
meaningful. some very fine moments created here.

immensely loved the extended metaphor.
this is a winner, G.

i guess i am hooked finally. would be frequenting your space a lot more in future.

write on beautiful,

x

sumeet
 

I wish many Would pick my poems apart! That's a fact. I'm here for help. And this was great. I will fix this once I get some much much needed sleep thank you much xoxox

She will be your background of beauty  
Never to wither and die in the minds of those who love you

Beautiful write babe...  

Thank you

lovely...

sweet, but not sappy

write on & on

Thank you much Daniel xoxox

How beautifully metaphorical. I was enchanted by this poem, Rosa is so fragile, yet has a certain strength about her. Good job. xoxo

Thank you sweetie xoxox

Gigi this is so beautiful..I love Rosa!

Me too ak!! Missing your clued writing lol xoxox thank you C.Z