deepundergroundpoetry.com
Last night
I just can't deal with the pain
Emotions falling like torrential rain
Deny what is in my mind
No solution ever can I find
To make sense of it all
I was winning for a while I recall
Rationalize what is right now
Peace and calm somehow
All I do is numb my soul
Over it I have no control
Now I feel the way I feel
Losing what is very real
This phase and this maze
Fighting the fire, I'm in the blaze
Tearing every wall down
Every cell is my brain is like a burning town
It's sad to feel nothing at all
To stare with no train of thought at a wall
The writer who often writes
Of all that is here or missing to himself he recites
Evil should not prevail
As it often does tell the tale
Yet the sun should shine
The pants shall grow and be Divine
Is it how we view things
That either agony or happiness it brings?
Or is it the past?
That in us shall forever last
Is our opinion our reality?
As creativity is the individuality
Do we clearly see in life's glass?
Seconds, minutes and even hours pass
I hear the oceans breeze
As I listen to Pink Floyd as I please
Wearing a comical cowboy hat
Wondering about my habitat
Finally in bloody bliss
I can never get enough of this
It's amazing and truly regrettable
Because this state of mind is absolutely inevitable
My alarm clock is off right now
Sleeping in, is it possible somehow?
As I head to bed
Ready to pass out yet endless thoughts run in my head
Emotions falling like torrential rain
Deny what is in my mind
No solution ever can I find
To make sense of it all
I was winning for a while I recall
Rationalize what is right now
Peace and calm somehow
All I do is numb my soul
Over it I have no control
Now I feel the way I feel
Losing what is very real
This phase and this maze
Fighting the fire, I'm in the blaze
Tearing every wall down
Every cell is my brain is like a burning town
It's sad to feel nothing at all
To stare with no train of thought at a wall
The writer who often writes
Of all that is here or missing to himself he recites
Evil should not prevail
As it often does tell the tale
Yet the sun should shine
The pants shall grow and be Divine
Is it how we view things
That either agony or happiness it brings?
Or is it the past?
That in us shall forever last
Is our opinion our reality?
As creativity is the individuality
Do we clearly see in life's glass?
Seconds, minutes and even hours pass
I hear the oceans breeze
As I listen to Pink Floyd as I please
Wearing a comical cowboy hat
Wondering about my habitat
Finally in bloody bliss
I can never get enough of this
It's amazing and truly regrettable
Because this state of mind is absolutely inevitable
My alarm clock is off right now
Sleeping in, is it possible somehow?
As I head to bed
Ready to pass out yet endless thoughts run in my head
Published 28th Apr 2010
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29th Apr 2010 5:33am
I've been reading a few of your poems, and I like what I read =)
However, can I make a suggestion?
perhaps try experimenting with free verse. Don't be afraid to not rhyme. I know it's more common to not rhyme, or half rhyme, then to obey a structure in this website, but that's for a reason. You don't have to listen to me, but you can just play with it if you like. Have fun, =)
However, can I make a suggestion?
perhaps try experimenting with free verse. Don't be afraid to not rhyme. I know it's more common to not rhyme, or half rhyme, then to obey a structure in this website, but that's for a reason. You don't have to listen to me, but you can just play with it if you like. Have fun, =)
2nd May 2010 7:42pm
Thank you for reading and commenting. Yes free verse in really popular right now. I also understand your idea of mixing it up sometimes. But I don't wont to destroy a good thing, my work may ryhme but it's a lot different than most peoples work who do rhyme. I feel like a pitcher, In order for me to remain a good writer I must stay where my success is at.
