deepundergroundpoetry.com
Cherished Past
*please read and comment or dont read at all*
About this piece: this is an unexpected freestyle i don;t do much of these. my poetry is usually well thought out and mulled over in my mind for days on end... so there's no catchy rhymes or metaphors or any of that creative shit its just a raw piece that is bugging me to jot down...
Whats in the dark must come to light.
Life is ironic and funny i saw the one person i trained myself not to think about, not to care about not to show any emotions towards. i trained myself to try to forget about him to just throw my cards in and fold. not to say i haven't thought about him. that would be a outright lie. the truth of the matter is that i'm broken. there were so many things that i could not tell him. out of fear, or more like being a coward. the truth of the matter is that i have been depressed for years, five to be exact and during that time i trained my self not to care, not to love only to hate. the things that happened before meeting him were never mentioned, they were never brought up, my mistake.
the truth of the matter is that love is a strange thing, it can be the most glorious feeling in the world, yet, it can be blinding and unforgiving. the past scarred me shattered my heart to unmentionable atoms. the last had me like a puppet and the puppeteer was cruel. ever since the faithful day i found myself drowning in a cesspool of my own thoughts and the mad rambling voices that told me how insignificant i was nearly drove me over the edge...
Then i met him.
Life as i made it out to be was quickly dissolving, a glance at his smile or a brush of the hand sent my heart racing at speeds i was sure to kill me! the playful banter or the random jokes shared, just between us, made me feel invincible! But just as he began to change my tainted outlook on life, i let myself get in the way. Too afraid to love or to be loved.The uncertain was unbearable, depression was what i knew the best, distancing myself from him was my choice at dealing with my fucked up emotions. He changed everything and began to heal the remains of what was.
Now the voices are back. They aren't what they used to be then, now they tell me to enjoy life, seek out fulfillment, take pleasure in the little things, cherish what makes life... worth living.
I may have lost the starlight, what better name to give him at this point... that beautiful glowing mass that just makes you look around and realize how dark the world is.. that is... without starlight...
Moral of the story: cherish what you have... you never know when its too late to look to the stars and dream
About this piece: this is an unexpected freestyle i don;t do much of these. my poetry is usually well thought out and mulled over in my mind for days on end... so there's no catchy rhymes or metaphors or any of that creative shit its just a raw piece that is bugging me to jot down...
Whats in the dark must come to light.
Life is ironic and funny i saw the one person i trained myself not to think about, not to care about not to show any emotions towards. i trained myself to try to forget about him to just throw my cards in and fold. not to say i haven't thought about him. that would be a outright lie. the truth of the matter is that i'm broken. there were so many things that i could not tell him. out of fear, or more like being a coward. the truth of the matter is that i have been depressed for years, five to be exact and during that time i trained my self not to care, not to love only to hate. the things that happened before meeting him were never mentioned, they were never brought up, my mistake.
the truth of the matter is that love is a strange thing, it can be the most glorious feeling in the world, yet, it can be blinding and unforgiving. the past scarred me shattered my heart to unmentionable atoms. the last had me like a puppet and the puppeteer was cruel. ever since the faithful day i found myself drowning in a cesspool of my own thoughts and the mad rambling voices that told me how insignificant i was nearly drove me over the edge...
Then i met him.
Life as i made it out to be was quickly dissolving, a glance at his smile or a brush of the hand sent my heart racing at speeds i was sure to kill me! the playful banter or the random jokes shared, just between us, made me feel invincible! But just as he began to change my tainted outlook on life, i let myself get in the way. Too afraid to love or to be loved.The uncertain was unbearable, depression was what i knew the best, distancing myself from him was my choice at dealing with my fucked up emotions. He changed everything and began to heal the remains of what was.
Now the voices are back. They aren't what they used to be then, now they tell me to enjoy life, seek out fulfillment, take pleasure in the little things, cherish what makes life... worth living.
I may have lost the starlight, what better name to give him at this point... that beautiful glowing mass that just makes you look around and realize how dark the world is.. that is... without starlight...
Moral of the story: cherish what you have... you never know when its too late to look to the stars and dream
Published 2nd Sep 2012
| Edited 5th Sep 2012
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