Should I Stay? Or Go?

these thoughts come and go
should i act on them or wait to go?

my heart is dead
my mind is confused

im dead inside but not out
can i get through all this self doubt?

holding the gun
my hand shakes on the trigger

crying silently i think of all our good memories
i feel myself torn once again

sadly i wont see home again
i pull the trigger

hear the shot
now im floating above this spot

my body is there
bloody and lifeless

am i dead? is this my hell?
to forever endure this pain we used to share?

i thought death was the answer
i thought death was the cure

maybe i was wrong
death is easy life is hard

i proved my weakness to my demons
here i am dead in mind and body

i force myself to fade
in the darkness that my demons gave

now the only thing left of me is
a puddle of blood
and a rusty broken blade....