Aha

As always I dig this. Though I had to read it over again to understand the last stanza.

Thanks man. I was trying to make some kinda semi serious statement on absurdity. Left it more abstract and ambiguous than is normally in my comfort zone, yet something felt "right"ish about. So tempted to remove it but lettin it breathe for now

"Spontaneous" would be the best way I'd describe this poem.  If you had to ask me, I'd say some of the best poems written are on a spontaneous whim as opposed to the ones that take hours to compose.  Time in writing, if invested to much, tend to damage the flows and stanzas and it's metaphoric meaning thus making the piece an utter, hopeless mess.  What you got here, Lightbaron, is a masterpiece!  Cheers because I just absolutely loved it;)

Deviln, I tend to agree with-and thank you much on your inciteful commentary..

And I really really cant thank you  enough for the compliment,its appreciated greatly and helps my confidence on this piece.
like I said, there are things here that feel "right", but I have not gotten much feedback so I have not been sure if its being heard... Again thanks devlin

Ha! I really like this one, there was something quirky and light hearted about this to sometimes dark subjects. I dont know, but I know its talent. This is really good.

thank you very much ms. girl of the low ride variety