Bittersweet Regret

My life was written in red,
twas a life of blood and wine.
and though I can't remember everything,
I recall a hell, from time to time.

But the pain I caused in ignorance,
is youths only card to play,
And if I could go back again,
I'd do things a different way.

For what shames me in the light of day,
gave me pleasure in the dark.
As I fed the endless fire,
a desire that started with a spark.
 
But that blaze burnt out my morals,
it broke my mind and heart.
And a love built on corruption,
was always bound to fall apart.
 
But what are regrets,
but memories, not yet put to bed,
And now I must carry these thoughts and fears,
with me till I'm dead.