the Reason I live

Light up my way
Light up my eyes; this fire
It burns and consumes
I sit warm and comfortable as you
Speak with your tongue intertwined with my heart
It feels like you are the only one for me
You laugh when I ask you who you
Think you are telling me
Who I can and cannot love
I’m not your damn business anymore
You made my flowers bloom and you
Turned away and they rotted and died yet you remain
The reason I live,
You.

Why aren’t you here with me anymore?
Speak to me, my love
With your rotted tongue and wordless tears
I left you utterly speechless didn’t I? Maybe even dead?
I sure as hell hope so, that note you found, it was not meant
For you. It was meant for the painkiller I sometimes hate.
My best friend and she gave it to you, Love
The fool she is sometimes!
She laughs it off with drugs and a blade
She likes the way it feels, “it hurts so good,” she said once
“Getting high.” sitting on a porch swinging her arms
Outstretched in the sun like a rare bird, she really is beautiful
And even you knew that. You wanted her but you are
The reason I live,
You.

You are a demon in my heart
The bullet in the back of my mind
Every second I want you back by my side
Where I wish you belonged and not beside Her
The fortunate girl with the beautiful face
And the body you can’t seem to get enough of, Love
But your voice on the phone brings me to my knees you make me
Want to scream that I love you but I, of course, cannot
Tell me what you want I will do my best to give myself to you
Do you want my soul? Yours.
I’ll give it to you because you are
The reason I live,
You.

Take me in and save me please, I beg you
I’ve dreamed of this day when we could just talk to each
Other and I could count the tears that slipped down my cheek as I
Beg for mercy, Love. Oh, how I need you!
You would never understand how long I’ve waited for this day, Love
All I want is you and everything you have. I want it all. Am I greedy
Or am I just the best thing you ever thought you had?
Can I own you now? I need to have you with me
I need to have you beside me. Don’t leave me.
I could never let you just walk away when
All you are and all you deserve to be is
The reason I live,
You.

Can I write you another love letter and spill your name on its pages?
Can I beg you to never leave me again?
Would you listen to me if I did?
You seem to like her too much though, love
You seem to want her there, by your side
Hiding behind her so I can’t see your face, but I need you. Now.
I need you like I need my heroine
I need you so much I can’t explain this type of pain inside of me
I need you more than I need myself, so I understand
Why you wouldn’t want me because, seriously, look at me, but
All I know is how much I love you. Boy, you will always be
The reason I live,
You. (And only you!)