deepundergroundpoetry.com

The Safety of Being Solitary

The fear of being seen,
Not the physical action of someone processing the curves and dips in my features,
But rather the sharp edges and bumps of my personality and being.

The knowledge that someone else knows me,
Like the plants know the sun,
It crushes my chest inward.

The fear of being heard,
Not the physical action of processing the sounds that vibrate up my throat,
But rather the meaning of the words I force out of a frown.

The knowledge that someone hears me,
Like the animals hear the rushing water,
Listening for a sound almost impossible to catch and impossible to miss.

To be noticed,
It�s like bearing my throat to the world.
An animal instinct in me screaming to stop,
Strike and cower in a hole deep underground.

I�d rather bear my physical heart than my soul,
I�ll let it be carved out of me before I scream out in pain.
I try so hard to be uninteresting,
So dull to look at that no one perceives a thing.