Silver lining

Drowning was so easy aspiration had no cause.
All 'cause once it started raining then since only ever pours.
It's a spiral of destruction nearly out of control.
I'll keep getting worse willingly digging this hole
Drawn to mental illness like I'm plotting a graph.
Like the times I bawl my eyes out then maniacally laugh.
Cant say I'm concerned about the self that I'm losing.
I've always been worthless and that was of my choosing.
Another common mistake bland and run of the mill.
Cannot be called tragic when there's nothing to kill.
Don't like hurting others I'm in love with self abusing.
Comical a let downs never been so amusing.
Never really fit in even if I belong.
Least I'll be a great example of what not to do wrong.