religiosity for me is just denial

I tell you that I’ve given up
my homosexuality because
you’ve told me again and again
that Jesus is the way

and I guess that in some dark part of myself
I still want to please and feel whole within
the dreams of someone else

to feel what cultists feel
when loneliness evaporates
like ice cream on the pavement in July

but Eros rules the landscape of need
for queers as much as straights
and just as gods do not make sense
are stuffed with pure caprice
so sex does not accord
with binary function always

and anyway
when I look at Creation all I see
is Uncreated lunacy
an ever-complicated whirl
of random chance, and you and me