deepundergroundpoetry.com
Life filled with silence
I can't believe your lying there
Silent,
my tears can't cry
You left the life we shared
Endless days after you died
Stars glisten in the night
Please come back to me
I need a sign from you
I miss you, can't you see
One last look at you
As I think back to our lives
I touch your face
Where your spirit lies
They close the coffin
I can't accept your gone
I'll see you on the other side
Silence beckons me, life carries on
Silent,
my tears can't cry
You left the life we shared
Endless days after you died
Stars glisten in the night
Please come back to me
I need a sign from you
I miss you, can't you see
One last look at you
As I think back to our lives
I touch your face
Where your spirit lies
They close the coffin
I can't accept your gone
I'll see you on the other side
Silence beckons me, life carries on
Published 3rd May 2024
Author's Note
For the silence comp
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 3
reading list entries 1
comments 6
reads 134
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
3rd May 2024 11:19am
Seriously some of the best writing I've seen you pen. Compositionally it is well laid out with a solid meter that flows well when read. The choice of content in regards to the topic of silence is poignant and given great depth by the realistic subjects and injected emotional content. It felt real an alive, current and natural. A truly well executed poem. Good luck in the competition.
3rd May 2024 11:23am
Thanks Thor. I tend to surprise myself every now and then. It is more of an emotional write and it's something I rarely dive into. Thank you for the kind words & enjoying it.
3rd May 2024 11:20am
An inevitable truth. Even in the face of death's silence -
life carries on.
Very well captured in your words and image.
This was a great first read of the day!
And good luck
life carries on.
Very well captured in your words and image.
This was a great first read of the day!
And good luck
3rd May 2024 11:24am
4th May 2024 7:54pm
How did you fair in the competition? What was it, anyway?
I was drawn to this piece. Of course, I'm into emotional stuff. I wasn't expecting it to be what it was, but I love it. The piece feels so genuine, and I like your rhyme pattern with the formal stanzas. Nicely presented and thought provoking piece.
I was drawn to this piece. Of course, I'm into emotional stuff. I wasn't expecting it to be what it was, but I love it. The piece feels so genuine, and I like your rhyme pattern with the formal stanzas. Nicely presented and thought provoking piece.
4th May 2024 8:02pm
I believe the comp ended yesterday. Not sure if I won or not. Probably not. Glad you enjoyed this piece Meg.
You rock!!
You rock!!
