Dr Feral

Calling Dr Feral
That woman deserves a medal!

All these kinky deviants
Seeking her advice…
“Can I have your help please?”
“I think my vag has lice!”

Men and women in their droves
Call upon her in their hour of need
Where would we be without her?
Assisting with our every deed!

“My legs are stuck in stirrups!”
“My dicks stuck to the floor”
“Can you rid me of this rash please?”
Christ she’s heard it all!

“I’ve got pins stuck in my testicles”
“I’ve glued my pubes straight to the wall”
“I’ve got boils all up my arse crack”
“My girlfriend’s locked her jaw!”

“A strange smell is emanating”
“I think I may have thrush?”
“But thick green puss is weeping!?”
“My toilet legit won’t flush!”

“All this lube got in my eyes!”
“Help! I’m going blind!!”
“But should it really look like that!?”
My friend once asked under disguise!

“I’m asking for a friend!”
“Would you mind taking a look?”
“Would you join us for this threesome?”
“You can play as Captain Hook?”

“How much for your services?”
“But how much is your fee?”
Girl, I won’t charge you nothin’
I’ll help you ALL for free!

We all have sexual escapades
We all have made mistakes
We all need weird sex advice
We all get weird aches

These freaky feral incidents
Eventually all build up
It’s hard to keep it to yourself
Or eventually you fuck up!

I don’t care if it’s an STI
UTI, or STD
If it’s help you need, you’ve got it!
You can always count on me!