an item

the item

It is strange today, I feel sad
bought a new cell phone and sensed it was too expensive
I never liked spending money on myself makes
I feel guilty, like I do not deserve it.
I bought a suit when I was twenty a nice suit I bought
in Stockholm, it soon got too small, and I gave it
to my sister's husband.
Being the stinting sort, he wore it until it fell off.
When a child, I never wore anything new
only hand-me-down
I was OK with that.
The phone is black, and I feel intimidated by its sternness
when I switch it on, the phone is pink and blue
looks like nursery colors to me
 I have to put emails
into it, and that will be a struggle.
Why did I buy this bloody phone it was an impulse
walking past a shop selling phones
the girl who sold me the phone looked beautiful
even with a face mask,
I didn´t understand what she said
it is like, I´m hard of hearing when I don´t see
People's lips move.
Oh well, it is done I will wait a few days and see.