not nevertheless

you always steal my senses
you chant your mantras
opposite image of that
that is not in the mirror
hovering over me
you always cloud my ideas
you pray the rosary and
the sidewalk stones
recite your name
I beg love
let me paint
the sky of another color
My beauty didn't cry*
the eyes of the beholder.
* Verb that, because there is not,
I make it exist to offer
don't drown in pitchers
the marine look
from someone who doesn’t want me…
my non-ugliness crown
queen of a country
of wonders,
the apple of the eye
of those who read me!
I stumbled into a room
of shattered glass
Where every shard is sharp
and stained with red
I see myself in pieces,
torn, aghast
a collage of the wounds
that I have bled
I try to escape, but I feel
only more pain
that cuts and heals
they tell me what I did,
or what I lost
but never the truth
that has a cost
I wander through
the pathway of glass
where every wall
reflects a different face
I see myself in fragments,
broken, vast
A poem
that I cannot end or erase.
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