deepundergroundpoetry.com
Spark of Life
the sun's many sublime fingers came creeping in
prying open the blinds to our bedroom window
watching us through the slit in the curtains
solar flares bounced off the sweat on your shoulders
sending iridescent light scattering across the walls
the sun burned holes into the carpet, peering through
hoping to catch a glimpse of the spark of life
that had just taken place, hidden in the dark
prying open the blinds to our bedroom window
watching us through the slit in the curtains
solar flares bounced off the sweat on your shoulders
sending iridescent light scattering across the walls
the sun burned holes into the carpet, peering through
hoping to catch a glimpse of the spark of life
that had just taken place, hidden in the dark
Published 16th Jan 2024
Author's Note
Would definitely appreciate any suggestions for rephrasing of lines or other words. I want to keep editing and working on this one. Also I will let you know if I am pregnant with baby number 4 (child number 5) in about....2 weeks.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 6
reading list entries 0
comments 6
reads 90
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
16th Jan 2024 4:43pm
16th Jan 2024 5:30pm
16th Jan 2024 10:03pm
I thought it was fantastic. I wouldn't change anything.
Maybe end it with a line about love or your heart.
Great luck to you!
Maybe end it with a line about love or your heart.
Great luck to you!
17th Jan 2024 2:33am
I picture my little dog laying early morning on some scattered light on the carpet, Nice spill!
17th Jan 2024 3:09pm
I tried to see need for improvement but couldn't find it. It is A+ in my estimation. You have an amazing gift so WRITE ON! Hugs and peace,Oral
22nd Jan 2024 6:57pm
