Fuckable and Ugly

Sometimes I drown in the memory
Of how ugly you made me feel
When people would cut out their heart
Simply to have the chance to touch me

How could I ever truly feel ugly?
When someone will always be willing to fuck me
There will always be some greedy set of hands
That would take pleasure in the use of this body

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder
And so many eyes take joy in looking at me
I do not understand or agree but still they do
It's not something I will ever understand

But loving me? Caring for me? Protecting me?
I am not stupid. There is no love in those fingers
No deeper feeling other than to take and take
Is that the true cost of feeling beautiful... To be used

I'd rather never be touched again
Than ever feel ugly the way that they cause Knowing that someone is always willing to fuck me
But so few are willing and able to love me