deepundergroundpoetry.com
valentine's day card
It took a few minutes to find the right card
and five minutes to write these words
Finally in you I've found what I need
underneath all your lies your a wonderful person
can I share my forever with you together in our love
kind heart has opened my eyes to your beauty
you are my only
on and on we will share intimate moments
u are my everything
Happy Valentine's to you who I love the most
and five minutes to write these words
Finally in you I've found what I need
underneath all your lies your a wonderful person
can I share my forever with you together in our love
kind heart has opened my eyes to your beauty
you are my only
on and on we will share intimate moments
u are my everything
Happy Valentine's to you who I love the most
Published 16th Feb 2010
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16th Feb 2010 5:56am
piece of art within itself. It made me smile in a good way x Thank you for sharing x
16th Feb 2010 4:55pm
aww it's so touching =]]
the person you are reffering to must
have been so moved by your words
greatt
the person you are reffering to must
have been so moved by your words
greatt
20th Feb 2010 6:39pm
thanks for the kind comments .. sometimes in love you must read between the lines
8th Apr 2012 7:17am
I have some critiques but if you don't want them please ignore them.
In line 4 'your' is supposed to be 'you're.'
Line 6 feels awkward without a 'you' at the beginning.
Starting line 9 with 'U' just seems out of place when everywhere else you use an actual 'you.'
After those, this is a lovely piece. I love the tenderness of it all. Keep writing.
In line 4 'your' is supposed to be 'you're.'
Line 6 feels awkward without a 'you' at the beginning.
Starting line 9 with 'U' just seems out of place when everywhere else you use an actual 'you.'
After those, this is a lovely piece. I love the tenderness of it all. Keep writing.
