Trauma's Scar

Some days, it feels like I can't breathe,
And I find myself asking that same question,
"Why did you leave?"
I think I always knew but never wanted to believe
That one day our love, I would grieve.

Most of the time, I feel alright,
But when the day surrenders to the night,
I also surrender to the fight.
Our demons don't need an invite,
They lurk in the places untouched by light,
Never far nor out of sight,
An unspoken vow to always reunite,
Even now as I write, I'm filled with dread,
Knowing we'll meet again tonight.

Your words still linger in my head,
"The world would be better if you were dead."
In that moment, my soul bled.
I was barely hanging on by a thread,
You went to bed, and I fled.

Trauma is like an infection, another scar added to my collection.
I just wanted love and affection,
But you were too obsessed with your own complexion.
I lost myself while trying to become your image of perfection.
Looking in the mirror now, I feel a disconnection,
I no longer recognize my reflection.

I'll never forget how you seemed so amused,
While I lay on the floor beaten and bruised.
There are still days I feel confused,
But your actions cannot be excused.
Although I struggle with speaking my truth,
I know now I was abused.