deepundergroundpoetry.com
Whatever
Here we are, the day before
bruised knees find
solace in nothing.
A predilection for
dark harmonies floating
as soft smoke from incense
burning away at perfection.
Feel my gaze saturate
your thoughts, undiluted
and slack inside.
It never calcifies in ways
we expect: growing into this
ruptures those
little girl dreams.
We’re past all that now.
Stepping around truth
will always be thorns
with no roses.
bruised knees find
solace in nothing.
A predilection for
dark harmonies floating
as soft smoke from incense
burning away at perfection.
Feel my gaze saturate
your thoughts, undiluted
and slack inside.
It never calcifies in ways
we expect: growing into this
ruptures those
little girl dreams.
We’re past all that now.
Stepping around truth
will always be thorns
with no roses.
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likes 14
reading list entries 4
comments 13
reads 426
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Re. Whatever
30th Apr 2023 4:28am
Dear E,
I love the closing stanza. How wonderfully that sums up life as adults. Makes me miss bruised knees and skinned elbows. H🌷
I love the closing stanza. How wonderfully that sums up life as adults. Makes me miss bruised knees and skinned elbows. H🌷
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Re: Re. Whatever
2nd May 2023 00:16am
I don’t know where these ideas come from. But adulthood is balls. Period. 0/10 would not recommend.
Thanks, H!
Thanks, H!
Re. Whatever
1st May 2023 00:17am
Really like the melancholy here and that's weird because melancholy isn't that likeable but something resonates here and that's always a plus !!
You rule E
Xx
You rule E
Xx
1
Re: Re. Whatever
2nd May 2023 00:23am
I’m glad to know something here resonates with you! I’m melancholy to the core 😅
Xx
Xx
Re. Whatever
3rd May 2023 3:56am
Wonderful!
What a creative, intelligent write. Just enough to intrigue the mind, without being overdone.
Well done, Eerie.
What a creative, intelligent write. Just enough to intrigue the mind, without being overdone.
Well done, Eerie.
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Re. Whatever
6th May 2023 00:00am
Excellent, Eerie. The tag line at the end is a real killer tying it all together.
hugs,
buddhakitty.
hugs,
buddhakitty.
0
Anonymous
- Edited 26th Aug 2023 5:45pm
9th May 2023 1:27am
<< post removed >>
Re. Whatever
19th May 2023 9:44pm
Re. Whatever
23rd May 2023 7:42pm
Dear Eerie,
It's great to know our real self and admit it. It's the first step to success. J.Z.
It's great to know our real self and admit it. It's the first step to success. J.Z.
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Re. Whatever
24th Jun 2023 1:23am
You gave it a title!
Yes, bruised knees sounds about right toward the end.
Great job.
Yes, bruised knees sounds about right toward the end.
Great job.
0
Re. Whatever
8th Aug 2023 5:49pm
Here we are...
Bruised.
Dark hormones.
Burning away.
Your gaze.
Thoughts.
Rapturing...
Little girl dreams.
Never past that.
The truth is...
I need it so much.
No roses.
Just pleasure and pain.
Bruised.
Dark hormones.
Burning away.
Your gaze.
Thoughts.
Rapturing...
Little girl dreams.
Never past that.
The truth is...
I need it so much.
No roses.
Just pleasure and pain.
0
Re. Whatever
18th Nov 2023 1:00am
I followed the breadcrumbs and Im happy I did. These type of poems are deep, and I like deep. Its dark, yet its not....its Lark...light and dark mixed. Im an ass I know. LOL. great wrote anyway. Love it <3
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Re. Whatever
1st Apr 2024 8:10pm
This poem evokes a sense of introspection and melancholy, exploring themes of disillusionment and the passage of time. The imagery of bruised knees seeking solace, dark harmonies, and incense burning away at perfection creates a vivid atmosphere of emotional struggle and introspection. The shift from innocence to maturity, represented by "little girl dreams" and the acknowledgment of moving beyond them, adds depth to the poem's exploration of personal growth and the acceptance of reality, even when it's painful. Overall, it's a thought-provoking piece that invites reflection on the complexities of human experience.
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