deepundergroundpoetry.com
My word vs Theirs
It's been awhile since I've been here
Knowing it doesn't matter what happened
With no witness besides bruises did it even occur?
It's my word, my eyes, the evidence on my skin
Vs their words of denial and lies about they really did
Cops dont care unless you got money to spare
They'll look at you and make the choice
Which looks more honest and reputable
My face is a villians and my mind unwell
So I lay here in bed the event cycling in my head
Fighting the internal thoughts everyone knows
What did I do to deserve this happening to me?
What could I have done differently to prevent it again?
People make assumptions about who you are
Doesn't matter the reality... It'll always be this way
And people will always believe who looks more innocent
Knowing it doesn't matter what happened
With no witness besides bruises did it even occur?
It's my word, my eyes, the evidence on my skin
Vs their words of denial and lies about they really did
Cops dont care unless you got money to spare
They'll look at you and make the choice
Which looks more honest and reputable
My face is a villians and my mind unwell
So I lay here in bed the event cycling in my head
Fighting the internal thoughts everyone knows
What did I do to deserve this happening to me?
What could I have done differently to prevent it again?
People make assumptions about who you are
Doesn't matter the reality... It'll always be this way
And people will always believe who looks more innocent
Published 28th Nov 2022
Author's Note
Got a fucked up arm and what looks like a busted vein from a blood tech angrily and aggressively beating on my arm, using the wrong gage needle and in general being so rough I've her fingers imprinted on my arm. My head hurts. Can't stop thinking about what she did. How I cant report her because the medical system is so small here... No one would believe me over someone like her. I'm just... not a great victim. Blood techs assume Im a former addict because of the state of my veins when Ive had my blood drawn since I was ten. Maybe that's what she saw... And why she was so violent towards me. It's all fucked up.
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29th Nov 2022 00:35am
Your willingness to show your vulnerability posses such strength. My thoughts are with you, BBG.
Keep writing it out. There are people here that care.
Keep writing it out. There are people here that care.
29th Nov 2022 00:50am
29th Nov 2022 00:52am
No, they should not. To some it’s just a job not caring that they may be fucking with someone’s life. I’ve been there. I hear you.
29th Nov 2022 1:11am
Blood techs generally are some of the nicest people. It's bizarre that someone like her can be allowed around needles and vulnerable people.
There is a certain arrogance in the medical field of, 'I know better than you' kinda stance & they all stick together anyway. I once nearly fainted at a routine blood test appointment & when I pointed out that fact, they said, "Blah blah blah." They certainly didn't take my side anyway. It was around 1997 in an Ashford, Middlesex GP surgery, England. I don't remember the exact words but I distinctly remember them siding with the nurse, saying something like, ' No one's never complained before.'
29th Nov 2022 1:10am
Ive never experienced someone hitting me before taking my blood. It was terrifying. My arm looks terrible and it's dragged up a fuck ton of buried trauma.
29th Nov 2022 1:17am
29th Nov 2022 2:10am
I definitely took plenty of photos. She wrapped the gause so tight Ive a band of busted skin vessels too. It's all such shit man
29th Nov 2022 2:12am
Tell 'em, otherwise they'll never know, even though they know really.
I mean, let them know in the legal sense. :-)
I mean, let them know in the legal sense. :-)
6th Dec 2022 9:42pm
Sorry you had to go through this. Either way reporting it should bring it to someone's attention because she may have done it or is doing it to other people.
Hope you're feeling better.
Hope you're feeling better.
7th Dec 2022 1:12am
I ended up going to the er to make sure she didn't cause any damage. Today was the first time getting my blood drawn since this happened and I just... cried in the waiting room. 17 years of trust in blood techs down the drain. I don't know how Im going to get over this... But I have to
